Trouble in my worlds

[Gemo]

So recently a girlfriend I was dating for a couple years broke up with me (4 months ago to be exact)
But anyway I've been very preoccupied with thinking about her missing this person and pretty typical post relationship emotions basically some very tragic stuff happened she realized my anger issues are too much and the rest is history but this has also started interfering with my MDD I understand some people see MDD as a curse and that's totally reasonable but I see it as my place of peace and wonder and entertainment too so I rely on this to even sleep sometimes but now I can't even get halfway a story without it turning into something involving her or just straight up cuts out and loses focus and just stops altogether to start thinking of why am I thinking of her you know? I've had girlfriends before and I've obviously missed them but not once has it ever interfered with my MDD for the most part Ive hardly been able to initiate a day dream and basically I keep telling myself well inevitability I'm going to find someone correct I mean one way or another that's pretty much inevitable almost everyone does but it's not really doing anything i took 4 day soul searching trip to slab city to really understand life where I'm at and how people should and shouldn't treat each other hence my anger issues and it helped immensely Infact a guy there taught me there's no point in seeking revenge because you legitimately don't accomplish anything other than continuing a vicious cycle and after that trip I learned my place in life but this girl and my emotional attachment towards her is just really getting in the way and I don't know how to stop it or at least keep it away from my happy place

[BlackUnicorn]

Do you also have the problem that almost everything works as a trigger for DDing about her? For me there're now not just my usual MDD triggers. Now everything that reminds me of my crush (which is usually A LOT when you're crushing) works…

[Gemo]

Definitely worth a try I've had strong interests in music art and story writing and I have started on all of those however I just could never bring myself to actually finish a single piece of work don't know why and this has been happening since I was a kid but now I also have some very upsetting emotions to really pour into the creative process I'll definitely give it a try of anyone else has any ideas on dealing with this I will be checking this blog daily

[BlackUnicorn]

You know sometimes it's surprizing what helps to stay away from those dreams. For me that poem I posted on my page. I never write poems but it came to my mind when I was DDing pretty hard. And after wriing it down my crush-DDing was gone for almost a week and I felt great... I think it could have lasted longer but I came acrosse a huge trigger... So if you feel the urge to do something creative or new, do it, maybe it helps to back off a bit.

[Gemo]

Yea like I can suppress it but I don't think that's a very good idea I've done it before with other issues and I noticed it helped me develop anxiety that's why I'm just generally looking for another method of dealing with it

[Source]

Daydreaming is simulation based on what is inside your own head, and it has many ties to emotion one way or the other. This ex girlfriend of yours had a significant place in your mind, so it's natural that the thought of her would affect your daydreams.
Daydreaming is also the render of issues at lower levels. Fix those and it'll be gone. In the meantime, self control is the best containment you can get. Teach yourself to take and hold control of your own mind, but be careful not to let it degenerate into suppression.

[BlackUnicorn]

I'm really sorry for your loss :( I can relate to the part where you drag real people you're crushing on into your world. I love MD too but this is one of my major issues in life at all. And almost nothing is necessary to start this for me. Instead of my happy friends there's now frustrating dreaming of "What if"s and unrealistic stuff I want to become true. I think 4 months sucks and hurts like hell, but it's okay if you where in a relationship for years. Grieving can also help to accept with time. But be careful and observe yourself. Search help if it's still the same after a year. I took me once 2 years to get rid of such a situation and it became really really dangerous for myself.