Things Have Changed

[K. Pow]

My life has completely evolved from what it was when I last posted on here almost a year ago. Long story short, I am now sick, physically sick, and have had to accept that I will be for the rest of my life. It's all still very new, and I've had to change my entire life style. However, during this process I had to deal with the real world. I had to focus on my health and life and grades, so there was no time to MD. I think that I've gotten way better at handling it, although somedays I do get carried away. The whole experince has made me really value my friendships and want to be social and even have a relationship (even though I'm still single). Of course, it has helped to know that I am not the only person experincing these things, and whenever I felt really alone it helped to know that somewhere there were people struggling with exactly what I am. 

I guess I've learned that MD is a part of me and my creativity/coping skills. But it's also not my entire life, and that in order to be ok from now on I have to focus on the real world.

Yes, I still MD all the time. Like 2-3 hours a day.

However, I feel control over my self now, which is a far cry from what I felt this time last year.