is it possible to overcome maladaptive daydreaming?

i daydream since i was a kid and I don’t actually remember when it all started and I want to ask people who overcome maladaptive daydreaming how did you do this? and can you say that you overcome this in 100%? Like is it even possible to live a normal live and stop daydreaming all the time? Beacause I feel like it influence my everyday life, I can’t focus on school, my exams, my work and i wonder if I ever will have a normal life without wasting my time on daydreaming and will it help if I go to the therapist even when maladaptive daydreaming is not officially a psychology disorder and there is no specific treatment??

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Comment by Sakshee Dhumal on March 16, 2021 at 8:45pm

( I am not someone who overcame it but this is what's helping me right now)

Hey! I too don't remember at what age I exactly started MDing. And yeah I understand you. A few months back it was so difficult for me to even STAY in the present moment, like I just couldn't , I used to automatically zone out and realise a few moments later that i've started daydreaming without even knowing. I used to get so frustrated after seeing the loads of pending homework in front of me.

About overcoming MD, 

I can't say I got 100% over it but I can definitely see some changes. I doesn't affect my day to day life anymore. I can easily stay in present when I want to. And most importantly I can face any hard things. Before whenever I had to do something that I didn't like ( ex: H.work) I started daydreaming to avoid doing it. Or if anything that hurt me emotionally happened I would be triggered to daydream. But now I face all those situations like normal people do. 

I think you should try it too. Like whenever you are given a boring job and feel like daydreaming . Stop yourself right there and try to complete that job seriously. I am not saying it would be easy but its definitely possible if you keep trying. After all it completely depends on how determined we are to get rid of MD. If you had told 15 year old me to do this I wouldn't have been able to. But recently a few things happened in my life which made me determined to get rid of MD. You might be in that phase too or maybe you'll get into it soon. 

About psychologist, 

When I went to a psychologist and emptied my heart out , I felt much better. And he didn't seem to know anything about MD but when I explained it to him he told me his observations. Because of him I could understand myself and my MD much better. Sometimes when you see your problems from others' point of view you get a lot of ans. 

I don't know upto what extinct MD can be cured , but we should definitely set a goal of curing it 100% . 

Just trying to control MD (not finding a permanent solution) and compromising with that won't cure it. 

Comment by Valeria Franco on December 23, 2020 at 1:48pm

Actually, I did.

Shortly after I found out about this place and I started to take action and commit myself to spread the knowledge of MD, it... sort of disappeared. I also worked on myself, making changes in my life and mind. I was trapped in life didn't understand, which had disappointed me.

So I pushed to make it more interesting, making mistakes or doing sometimes weird things, but it saved me.

I don't know if dreams are gone forever, but now it has been something like 4 years that I'm free. I daydream sometimes, but it is substantially different than before.

I think we shall not "cure dreams", we should "cure life".

Comment by Andy Mebbins on December 20, 2020 at 5:41am

I hypothesise that psilocybin might just be the antidote we need.

Comment by Ola on December 20, 2020 at 4:03am
Thank you all for responding. It’s really very helpful.
Comment by Gabby on December 19, 2020 at 10:17am
I'm a long way from being in control of my MDD, but what sometimes helps me is to set aside time for it. Maybe an hour before bed and a couple hours on the weekend. You can just daydream, or mix it with an activity that doesn't require too much concentration, like cleaning. That can sometimes help me to cope with doing real life things, knowing that I have planned for it. Makes me feel less guilty. I have OCD, and I only have peace in my head when I'm totally engrossed in something, be it a daydream or something else I'm doing like reading a book (depends on topic) or gardening. This is probably really hard to do with study, but if you can find a way to completely absorb yourself in a topic, that might just help.
Comment by Sandra Danczyk on December 19, 2020 at 9:10am
Im daydreaming since I was 3 to 4 years . For me it was always about stability and being in control. I really enjoy to escape from reality & wasn't planning to do something about is. Just learn to use it. But... now that Im 26 I know that was a mistake, I pissed out on so many stuff and memories. There is like a year from my life I just don't remember, offcourse there are some small details, but I wasn't there, not mentally. So Im going to a psychologist and in february to a psychiatrist, maybe medication will help but Im more scared that this will destroy my fantasyworlds. Maybe its also time, because I dont want to lose anymore of my life. Now Im going through withdrawal, like I stopped using drugs.
Comment by Kayla L on December 18, 2020 at 4:24am

Identify why you daydream - what are you trying to run away from?

Here are some of the things that make me run away to daydreamland:

  • loneliness
  • perfectionist expectations (when I have to do something I'm not good at)
  • family problems that I can't fix

Once you're able to figure out what aspects of reality you're running away from, it makes you more conscious of when you're about to daydream. (for example, once I see that I have a lab write-up coming up (and I'm really bad at scientific writing), I sort of predict that Im in a daydream-prone mode and prepare accordingly).

When you've figured out that you're in a situation that makes you more prone to daydreams, here are some tips:

  • avoid daydream-inducing music or media (e.g. love songs, the OST of your fave film, overhearing your family's TV in your study area)
  • wear something uncomfortable (it helps pull your attention to reality)
  • try not to study in bed or on the floor

That's my two cents, hope it helps!

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