I have managed to stop MD

[Reena Patel]

Hello guys,

 

I just signed up now and wanted to hear your thoughts on my experience. I have experienced MD ever since I can remember. It was very bad especially during high school, as in I daydreamed practically all day and music was definitely a trigger!! I didn't know how to pay attention in classes and was disconnected with the outside world. My fantasy land consisted always of a boyfriend that I had who either existed and I made up his personality since I didn't know him well or the boyfriend was made up. I have had many different scenarios with different boyfriends and the stories sometimes interlink. Also, I had a lot of friends in my fantasy land and they were both made up or real people who weren't really my friends but who I thought was "cool" and "popular" in real life at the time. Over the years, the stories have changed much but while the made up friends stayed the same the real people friends varied according to who I wanted to be friends with at the time.

 

I found that whenever I came across these people who I thought was cool in real life, I could never be myself as I wanted them to like me. There have been times when I was pulled back into reality and felt so depressed and upset that my fantasy land wasn't true. So I once decided just to stop it for sometime, however I started back again about 2 months later. The thing is whenever I think back to this time, I felt that these 2 months were one of the least depressing moments I could think of in my life because I found that although MD gave me a HUGE amount of pleasure in the short run, it made me depressed in the long run.

 

However, since last September I was introduced to the world of personal development and I have been reading books and listening to tapes as to why we do what we do etc. and I figured out the cause of my daydreaming just yesterday. I wanted attention. That was why. I wanted attention from these "cool" people and the only way I was going to get it was if I daydreamed about it and I wanted attention from a boyfriend, from my made up friends. I then came to realise that the reason WHY I wanted attention because I felt that I wasn't important as a person and was not comfortable with who I was. In fact, I valued myself so little as a person. I would never express my opinions as I wanted everyone to like me. That was how I would make myself feel important, by trying to make people like me. I realised today that by thinking some people are "cool" was VERY vain of me and that I thought so little of myself as a person that I wanted these popular people to be friends eventhough I didn't know the slightest bit about them. What did that say about me and how I viewed myself? So I changed my belief. There are no people that I am intimidated by because I don't need attention anymore because I am important no matter whether people dislike me or like me. When I look back to my life, in my late ages, I don' want to regret that I was too insecure with myself to be myself around others so I had to live a fantasy land and not live the life that I was given. In my fantasy land, I am slim, my personality os the way I want it to be and my storylines are based so that I ALWAYS get ATTENTION.

 

As of today, it hit me that I valued myself so little as a person for the whole of my life, I have now changed my belief. I am important just like everyone else is and not everyone has to like me as all that matters is that I will stay true to myself and that itself will give me the greatest satisfaction.

 

These were the reasons of WHY I had MD and I know that everyone else must be experiencing it for plenty of other differnt reasons but I think that for me, it essentially came down to my insecurites in my actual life that I was experiencing because as soon as now I am happy with who I am as an individual, it has stopped and eventhough I have tried it again, it is actually creating more pain than pleasure right now. What do you guys think of my experience? ( if you made it to the end lol.. sorry it was so long but I had to get these feelings out)

[Jo Ann Girard]

I've never, ever daydreamed about boyfrinds or attention, I dayddream on greatness. I daydream on my favorite books and my own books.

[Reena Patel]

Hey, I had quite a few complex relationships, characters that I have known since I was 13 ( and now I am almost 20) and the older I got, the more stronger I felt the bond I had with these characters were. But ever since, I have found the CAUSE as to why I feel the need to have these character friends in the first place and dealt with that reason within myself, I now don't feel the need to have these relationships eventhough I was addicted to them before. In fact, whenever I do try it, I don't find any pleasure in anymore, sometimes I feel pain as I can feel myself slipping into my old beliefs that I am not important and need people's attention.   I realised I didn't feel important and craved attention from people.

 

If you want to stop this, I really really do recommend reading self development books and  listening to audio programs. This is how I have stopped it and I used to be addicted to MD like crazy. Write down WHY you do it. It might take a few times, I have been writing down the reasons I thought WHY I did it since last September and I finally managed to nail it down and ever since I have worked on that reason, and to get rid of that insecurity I had, I don't feel the need to MD. Try Morty Leftkoe's free eliminating belief of I'm not important ( search it in google). It partially worked for me.

 

I REALLY  do want to help anyone who WANTS  to get rid of MD because I know that we can. Like I said before, MD can be a good thing if your a writer or to help visualise your dreams but for those of you like me, who felt stuck and addicted to MD and then felt depressed when you somehow get back to reality, I want to help because trust me guys WE CAN BEAT IT! It really depends on issues we have such as how badly opinions of others matter to us or insecurites such as self esteem issues etc. For those of us who do it, despite not wanting to, it is because we have some limiting beliefs and once you solve those, you can STOP MD. In fact, you won't want to do it.

 

So guys please feel free to message me or comment on this blog post and we can deal with the reasons as to WHY we have MD.

[Tila]

Hey Reena, your post has left me full of questions. What perplexes me the most......what happened to the complex relationship you must have had with your DD characters? Are they now just a memory to you? If you tried to daydream these days, would it feel unnatural, boring, unsatisfying?

I can't imagine stopping MD for good, but it's amazingly hopeful that you have! I would love to get over this. :(

 

[Jo Ann Girard]

Sorry, if I got rid of my MD I would be broke. I'm a writer, and it HAS HEPLED.

[Delorean Jones]

At a certain point, MD can simply become planning ahead.

[Reena Patel]

Hey Paris, trust me you can definitely beat this addiction. It all came down to a belief for me that I didn't even know that I had. I believed that in order for me to feel important, I needed everyone else to like me even if it meant that I didn't like myself or wasn't being myself around others. But this isn't true for anyone. How I went about fighting this was rather than trying to just stop it, I had to find why and the reasons as to why I felt the urge to have MD and then work on myself as a person in those areas. I did this through personal development books and programmes online such as Awaken the Giant within ny Anthony Robbins and Morty Leftkoe's program of eliminating 19 beliefs. I found that the Leftkoe program, is working particularly well with trying to beat MD.  When you want to change those parts of you that you don't like, this really helps. I did find some of it costly in price and was releuctant to spend as I was used to spending a lot on material goods, not on something that you can't physically hold and ti feels kind of weird because most people you know may think it is a waste of money but I eventually realised that the money is definitely well spent when it makes you a happier person at the end of it. I am really happy that I inspired you and if it is something that you WANT  to change, trust me you can do it!

 

Hey TJ, yeah I agree with you that MD can be a good thing as you can get a lot of creativity with it and it can help you visualise a dream that you have and then make you work harder towards those goals and dreams. With the self esteem issues, TJ I just want to tell you one thing I realised through my recent studying of why we do what we do. It is how we interpret events that makes all the change in our lives. This really is the key secret to life.  I think that from the fact that you don't think you have a supportive family, you interpreted that event as that means that I am not important and therefore don't have any value as a person. There are many other interpretations or meanings that you can give this. Maybe your family weren't supportive but this might be because you didn't do what they wanted you or you had different opinions and beliefs to them but this doesn't mean that you're not important and don't have any value but that you create your own opinions and beliefs. Another interpretation is maybe youre family arent aware of the way you feel. Maybe they actually do want to be supportive but we were never taught at school how to be good parents or siblings etc. We all had to just improvise and maybe copy or parents or some of us don't copy our parents because we believe they were wrong. I can see that you believe that you need others to make you feel worthy and important. That is how I used to be but TJ it is all in our heads. We really don't need anyone else to give us self esteem but ourselves. That is something we should all believe to make us happy in our lives. Only WE ourselves should be able to control how we feel. I really do recommend going through the personal development things that I mentioned for above. If you find it to costly there are some free stuff like eliminating a belief for free with the Mort Leftkoe method you can maybe look at online.

 

Guys I'm not saying MD is bad or wrong but I want us to have control over MD and not let it control us. Use it to pursue our dreams but not to make it a way to escape our insecurities which is why I was doing it. I understand this is much easier said than done, but with figuring out WHY you do it and working on your beliefs that make you feel that way which you can change, you can control MD in a positive manner. Feel free to ask me any qs.

 

Again sorry it was so long lol... I seem to just get carried away.

[Paris]

I can relate so much to the low self-esteem and desire for attention.  All my daydreams involve me impressing others and getting attention somehow. This post is so inspiring to me, it makes me feel like I can beat this addiction. Thank you.