I ask my mind a question. I have discovered that simple questions help me greatly with controlling my focus and attention. 

When daydreaming, my brain is full of questions and subsequently, my brain is busy searching other parts of my mind for the answer. This activity can be immersive and renders me unavailable to people near me. This drives my wife crazy.

So when I want to be in the moment I ask a question which requires me to observe the physical world:  “What is my purpose in this moment?” 

This works for me because this question deep connection to me. The words Purpose and Moment are meaningful concepts in my head. So I am focused on “what is this moment?” and “what should I be doing in it?” 

I think since I am focused on what my purpose as a human is (father, husband, coworker, insert “role” here) and what is this moment calling me to do). Sometimes it’s simple: Go with the flow and have a good time with your sibling you don’t see that often. I can go on and on, but this is my current nutshell of what’s working for me presently. 

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Comment by David Joesph on November 30, 2020 at 12:26pm

To add: I've been working hard on my personal growth this year. I can now recognize when I am caught up in my thinking brain. Thru mediation and some great books and great youtube videos, I have successfully changed my default mental state to that of the observer and not the thinker. I was not even aware that this mental state existed, but it allows me to look back if I wish and understand other people much better. There are people out there the can just exist in the moment and take what life throws at them without having to make sense out of everything. I am very glad to be one of those people now.

There is no way for one person to tell another how to do it is there though? We are all very different and we exist in different mental states. In other words, we are all on different trails with different terrains ahead of us. I can hope my tools are usable on your trail, but I am under no illusions that I know what steps to tell you to take for you to reach your destination. 

Comment by Valeria Franco on November 30, 2020 at 11:33am

I think this approach is the same as the mindfulness techniques.

I was taught them by a psychologist some years ago, and actually, I have always found it difficult to stay just there in the moment, stopping the thoughts flow. 

But it helps.

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