Wild Minds Network

Where wild minds come to rest

My brain does this thing where it likes to take my life's goodness and connect it via an intricate mental spiderweb to sin, evil, and damnation.  At least, that's the way I view it some of the time.  The rest of the time, I view it as my brain Discovering The Truth saving me from possible destruction.  Either way, it's a hard way to live.  The world has a tendency to grow smaller when your brain's favorite hobby is "Find the Contaminating Evil in Life!" 

It seems to get worse when I'm excited about real life.  I got really excited today when I passed a pre-screening test for a potential employment opportunity, but then my brain began to point out all the Wrongs and Sins.  

As I drove home from the test, I realized, "This is why I daydream about fictional people with mental illness."  My brain (from my current perspective) is bent on finding moral contaminants among the mundane, BUT when I can give it a fictional character and say, "Here you go--royally mess up this person's life until he's curled up in the fetal position in a locked psych ward," my brain takes a break from over-analyzing and micro-sizing my own life!

There you go.  My epiphany-esque-ish.  Maybe.  Sorta.  Kinda.  

[Unless reality is actually the flip side of this (which my brain is telling me it is) and my daydreaming actually drugs my brain to the extent that it is unable to save my soul from impending doom. ] 

Sometimes, all you can do is say, "Oh, life" and watch yourself with bemused terror and suspicious compassion.


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Comment by Gwenevere on October 5, 2014 at 9:38pm

Thanks, Gail!  :D

Comment by Abigail Rose on October 4, 2014 at 6:37pm

Sometimes, all you can do is say, "Oh, life" and watch yourself with bemused terror and suspicious compassion.

 

...As someone with a (similar?) "guilt complex", I think I'm gonna write this on my bathroom mirror...

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