Different

[Roseley Hahn]

I hate being with kids my age. I feel so different from them. Whenever there are group projects, I get upset because I rather be alone. I don’t want to hang out with my friends because its honestly boring. There is nothing wrong with them, its me. I think. But honestly, I have a best friend, he just doesn’t exist to normal people. In fact, I do have a group of friends, they just don’t exist to normal people. I also have a family, I love them very much and we have some crazy stories.

I don’t feel like my name fits me, at all. I feel like that name belongs to somebody else. I feel like I’m in the body of someone else, I’m in the wrong body. Whenever I write or imagine a story, I can never write parents or how much the character loves the parents because I feel like I’m lying. I really don’t have that many warm feelings for my parents. They are just people who tell me what to do. I always write about children or teens running away from their homes because that’s what I desperately want to do. The moment I am able too, I am moving far away from my family, like on the other side of the world. I recently told my family about my severe MD and they totally freaked out. I listen to music and pace when I daydream. I close the door, but now my parents are completely barging into my room, taking my phone and lecturing me about how that its unhealthy and that I need to do something productive. I want to cry. They don’t understand at all! I hate it!

I feel so lonely. I feel so different. But oddly enough, even with all this, ever since I was little I knew there was something off about me. I knew that I was different than other kids. I don’t know what to do. I just want to run away and leave.

[Roseley Hahn]

Thanks guys, I really appreciate your comments. It's good to know that there are people who feel the same way that I do!

[Sophie]

I know where your  coming from at school its difficult to concentrate as I'm daydreaming all the time, I sit there wish  my characters would burst in and take me away or just sit there with me. I have no real close friends they always let me down, when ever I write I can't write about my world its too difficult. I also have problems with my mum I don't live with her or my brothers and sisters this makes me daydream more! DAMN THIS VICIOUS CYCLE!

[ashlee]

I kind of feel the same way. 
thought i am not in my daydream, all my main characters are just ideal verisions of me, hanging out. And i feel like I love them more than I love people in real life.
I dont love friends as much as them
and i also dont have that many warm feelings with my family like my characters do with theres. They are starting to annoy me alot lately and it just makes me daydream about my characters parents and how much better they are. I tried talking to my mom about md once and she thought i had shitznophrenia (idk how to spell it) so i told her to forget about it. Then sometimes shed come in the room and say something like "watcha doing?? thinking abut the people in ur head?! ahah" and id get really really mad and not talk to her. she doesnt do that anymore. She also said "Oh so i told valerie at work today about your 'people in ur head' (despite me saying DO NOT TELL ANYONE) and she said ______" 

i am so excited to move out and go to college.