Wild Minds network

Maladaptive Daydreaming: where wild minds come to rest

Can't get along with people

3 more members just left, and all that reminds me of is how I can't get along with people, even online. I also had a bunch of people unfriend me on facebook recently too. I'm sure they were strangers, but still, it just reminds me how alone I am. I don't even say much on here, but what little I say is apparently offensive. I try not to be, but when you're cranky and have negative reactions to most of what you see in life, it's hard not to let that seep into what you write, even if you're trying to be nice. It just makes me even angrier because I feel worse about myself, and I don't want to. I don't want to feel bad all the time. I know this is all the result of my daydreaming because I've spent most of my life in a perfect world on the inside, and I just can't stand people on the outside. I keep to myself as much as possible, but apparently what little interaction I have with the world is enough to turn people off. I'll tell myself it's no big deal and get over it, but today's just one of those days when I'm extra irked. Thanks for reading. Sorry if whatever I have to say is so offensive all the time.

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Comment by Karen Stapp on February 11, 2012 at 1:34pm: I understand exactly how you feel. Sporadically, people leave my forum in droves. It's hard not to take it personally. I found myself walking on eggshells when posting there for fear that it was going to rub someone the wrong way. I would rarely get any replies which would make me feel worse. But I get what you are saying. Intellectually, I think you know it's not about you but emotionally it feels that way. I get it completely. :-) I think you do an excellent job here and I appreciate all the work you do on this site.

Comment by Cordellia Amethyste Rose on October 25, 2011 at 5:57pm: Which is worse, to be hated or pitied? By pitying someone, you're looking down on his or her life and calling it sad. It's just an insulting way to be seen. I don't like being hated, but at least I'm seen as a strong adversary rather than just sad. I don't appreciate pity. There's nothing good about it.

Comment by Amber on October 25, 2011 at 4:38pm: I know you've said before that you don't want people to feel sorry for you, but I'm sorry that you're lonely and people make you feel bad about yourself :( I think you're wonderful for making this site, and for helping people with MD to not feel so alone and confused. Don't let what a few people do/say stay with you and make you feel bad; I know it's hard, but try not to...I don't really know you, but maybe you could try finding something you're really interested in? and latch onto that, which could help you to meet new people, and make new friends. Just remember that there's SO MUCH in life to experience. Don't fake happiness, find it through living and enjoying life, even if it's only the little things; whatever makes you happy, do it. :)

Comment by sasi on October 13, 2011 at 2:24am: Been away from the site for a while but back now and wanted to respond.There is a lot said here that I agree with.Online communities(like any big community)are going to contain people with differing views and sensitivities.It is inevitable that sooner or later there's going to be a clash.It's a real shame that people feel they need to leave the site rather than just take time to cool off or understand what has been said.However none of us can ultimately be responsible for others actions.Cordelia-this is a wonderful site that helps and supports so many people.Try to focus on the majority who stay rather than the few who aren't able to be helped yet.

As for those who don't get a response from a post/blog.I agree it feels dreadful and very personal sometimes,especially if you have posted as a way of getting support.My experience of this site is that it is full of caring people who will support you but sometimes you need to let us know you need us and sometimes it just takes time.Please don't be disheartened.

Comment by J Noland on October 12, 2011 at 8:11pm: I really appreciate this site. Luckily I don't usually ruffle anyone's feathers because I just hate upsetting people. Now that is also a character flaw because people should be able to feel comfortable stating their opinion (respectfully of course) and feel secure that those listening will be aware enough not to freak out. I need to work on being a little more assertive. When people come together online it is so different than meeting in person. Add to that the fact that most of us aren't the biggest social experts to begin with. So open dialouge and understanding come in handy. I haven't interacted with anyone here who has been the least bit rude to me. On other sites (not mding sites) the flaming wars are atrocious. The moderators apparently don't care. I hardly ever post on other types of boards because I am afraid to get flamed by someone. I don't know why anyone would want to leave, maybe something is going on in their lives, maybe they want to stop dding so badly that they need to erase all of their possible triggers. Sometimes people get depressed and try to drop out of the radar. I'm staying here :-) All we can do is wish them well on their journey.

Comment by roxanne on October 12, 2011 at 7:33am: Hyperhero, I love that you not only love animals but put it out there as something that is lovable about you. I so agree.

Comment by Cordellia Amethyste Rose on October 11, 2011 at 8:33pm: People have responded to you on here. Just keep joining the conversation. People don't always reply to each person individually. Sometimes they just add their 2 cents and then go.

Comment by Cordellia Amethyste Rose on October 11, 2011 at 4:52pm: Thank you. It's good to know I don't have to be sweetsy nice and have the same opinion as everyone to be appreciated. I appreciate all you guys as well. I love my kitties, too, even though one of them is biting my ankle right now.

Comment by Lightman on October 11, 2011 at 12:40pm: Cordellia, I have a feeling that we probably will disagree on a lot, like A LOT... That doesn't change the fact that I have a lot of respect for you,. I think you are freaking awesome and you like cats, people who like cats (and are concerned for their well being) are good people!

I will take brutal honesty any day over faked politeness. One of the things I love the most about this site, is that we are honest, there is no pretending, no mask... Just us being ourselves, I spend a lot of my time feeling like I'm hiding in plain sight. but not when I'm on here... thank you!

Comment by Patty on October 11, 2011 at 6:01am: Maybe some of the people who leave realize they don't actually have MD, or maybe they're looking for a really active blog, or maybe they're afraid of being found out so they leave? It could be any number of reasons. Don't take it personal.