Hi, this is my first blog post. I joined a while ago but I've been too nervous to use the website.

I wanted to share an experience that I had a couple nights ago that kind of scared me.  I normally listen to music while daydreaming at night, typically very late into the morning (sometimes up until after 6 am). Sometimes I think about very sad things that cause me to stay awake.

I was having one of those *moments*- if that's what I should call it- when I was daydreaming about something that was really depressing (I'm not going to go into detail about it because it's very personal). It's pretty normal for me to start crying when I'm thinking about these things, but this time I started panicking. I felt extremely paranoid, and had to turn my light on and then leave to go to the bathroom because I thought something was in my room. I was already crying a lot, and when I went back to my room it got worse. I spent some time looking up if I was having an anxiety attack and found helpful breathing methods to calm myself down. I was shaking a lot and had some trouble holding my phone. Even after I calmed down I still was shaking until I fell asleep.

I do remember shaking and becoming dizzy several hours before this happened, but I associated that with my blood sugar. I'm not sure if it's high or low blood sugar (I've never been diagnosed), but I do know that my dad has either hyperglycemia or hypoglycemia, and whenever his blood sugar would change he would eat peanut butter or apples. I started doing the same whenever I felt like that and noticed it worked.

The day that I had that anxiety attack, though, where I noticed several hours before that I had felt symptoms of my blood sugar changing, I didn't eat anything to help me. I just kind of waited it out to see if it would go away. This might have contributed to my anxiety attack, but I'm not sure. 

I just wanted to get this off my chest. There's no one that I can really talk to about this. I've been struggling with maladaptive daydreaming since somewhere around the time that I first started middle school. I didn't realize what it was, or that other people struggled with it either, until I found a video on YouTube about. Ever since then I've been really interested in learning more about it.

-trin♡

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