12/14 No More Daydreaming: Day 1

[Creator]

I've tried this before. Once before. For two months straight, I never paced and daydreamed. I thought my problems were solved.

However, after learning more about this disease, I can see that I didn't really purge myself of it completely during those two months; When I would go walking, I would daydream. When I would drive I would daydream. When I would try to sleep, I would daydream.

You see, I didn't fully understand what the problem was. I was so focused on the strange pacing and "dancing" to music, that I didn't realize that daydreaming was the root of my isolation.

I thought since I wasn't pacing, that I wasn't isolating myself in my mind. But after reading all of your testimonials, I now realize that I was isolating myself, just in a different form...

Look, I have big dreams for my life. Amazing goals I would like to reach one day. I have applied to Juilliard! I want to write and act. I want to find inspiration in the real world, I want to be amazed by the beauty of life! I don't want to be trapped in my dream world for the rest of my existence. I mean don't get me wrong, it was wonderful while it lasted, but I want so much to lead a memorable life... and let's face it, if I was asked to relay my last 17 years of living on Earth, I don't think I would be able to do so. I'd be able to pick out various moments all shiney and gleaming in nostalgia, but the rest is just a blur of darkness and music.

So here, today,

I will begin the end of my daydreaming. I'll post a blog everyday, keeping track of my own progress.

Hope everyone has a good day! :)