I lurk quite a bit on this forum (lurking is what I'm good at, on and off line), and came to the conclusion that before I could really start getting a hold on my prodigal mind I needed to tell someone.

So I told my husband. And cried through the whole thing. I said what I had to say, he asked some questions- I even directed him to this place to show I'm not the only one, as if it would somehow cusion the fact that I'm not like other people. While he read, I sat there, dreading…