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At 3:09pm on June 15, 2022, Alex L. said…

I'm two generations older than you.  I've recently read dozens of age-appropriate books for teens on sexual orientation and gender identity.  You have much more good information available, and more supportive attitudes today, than when I was a teen.  You also have acess (in most high schools) to a psychologist right in your school.  Please take advantage of these wonderful resources, which did not exist when I was your age. 

Briefly, your feelings and experiences are normal for your age.  Your feelings toward both males and females can be confusing, if you are trying to use narrow defininitions of your romantic orientation and sexual orientation.  Be careful not to allow other people to label or define your feelings.   At your age, labels like "straight" "gay" "lesbian" or "bi" are almost meaningless.   Just enjoy your feelings, accept that you can feel many attractions, and your feelings can be fluid and change.   All of this is normal at your age, and does not define you.   Your body and mind are changing, and this will continue until puberty ends in your mid-twenties. 

The important things are:
•All your feelings of attraction are good and normal.  
•You may choose to act on your attractions,  but always do so safely. 
•Read as much as you can about teen sexual orientation of all types.  Most schools only provide limited sex education, so additional reading is a must.  
•Consider attending your school's Gay Straight Alliance (GSA) meetings to discuss your feelings, (or if there is none, form a group with other teens to ask a teacher to start a GSA group at your school). 
•Stay away from any person, group, or faith that promotes toxic ideas that some sexual feelings are "bad" or "good"; that is just prejudice.  All your feelings of attraction are good and normal.

I'm male and straight, but when I was age 15, in 11th grade, I fell in love with a boy who was a close friend.   I was scared and confused, and didn't know what to do, or who to talk to.  I didn't realize my feelings were normal for my age,  and had no effect on my predominantly straight orientation.  One of my life's biggest regrets is that I was too scared to approach him, and tell him how I felt about him.   Today there are lots of books for LGBT teens that deal with these issues and feelings, and provide help and useful ideas.

I wish that as a teen, I could have had all the resources that are available today.   Please use your resources,  talk with a caring and supportive adult, act on your feelings when you feel ready, and learn how to stay safe.   Good Luck!

At 7:25pm on November 23, 2018, Diana Lombard said…

Hey, i saw your comment on the LGBT group, and my situation is the exact same as yours. i'm in high shcool and all my crushes have only been on guys, but i found myself daydreaming about girls the way you have. I am not interested on a romantic relationship with girls but i still daydream about them!!

At 1:19pm on November 23, 2018, Jenna said…
Hi not sure how this works

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