Wild Minds Network

Where wild minds come to rest

This is how I remember it all starting...

As a child I grew up in a conservative family, I didn't have any friends outside of school, I wasn't allowed too because my parents felt that the world was evil and I would be persuaded into doing bad things. As such I never went out with friends or experienced the normal teenager life. All I did was go to school and come home, the only time I did go anywhere was with my parents. My day dreaming started at around 12 or 13 years old. I remember clearly dreaming about being married with a child and it sort of progressed from there, sometimes the guy would change but it was always the same scenario. I really don't know why at that age I would dream of being married. However I was always completely loved and wanted in my dreams. From then till now the situations around my dreaming have changed in terms of people and circumstances but the only thing that is constant from the time I was 12 till now, I'm 28 now.. Is that I'm always loved, valued and cared for in my dreams, that's the only part that doesn't change. I guess because its the part that has been missing my whole life and I find that love and comfort in my dream world.
I would never even think of telling anyone in my family about this because they would just say its from the devil, its something that they won't understand and because they have habituated ways of being, its not something they would be open minded enough to even try to understand. I also would not tell anyone else that I meet about this because most people feel that you have a good education, how can you say you have a disorder?
I'm not trying to get rid of my dreaming for the moment because its the only thing I have when days are dark and that's most of the time. I'm just grateful that I found this world within that has given me the love and comfort that is missing in the real world.

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