Introduction and a few questions

[Jeanne Colwell]

Hello

Firstly can I say I'm so happy to have found this website!

I am the mother of a 23-year-old son who I think is addicted to daydreaming. I used to daydream as much as I could when I was younger  but must have grown out of it naturally because I hardly ever do it anymore and never did it to the extremes that he does it. The reason I am posting is this:

My son has seen a long line of psychiatrists and been diagnosed with all manner of mental disorders ranging from OCD to psychosis. Most of the psychiatrists have, however, admitted they don't have a clue what is wrong with him.

I've decided to find out as much as possible in order to present some alternatives to his latest psychiatrist and see if anyone else has the same 'symptoms' as my son.

My son has told me he knows his fantasies/daydreams are not real but he enjoys them so much it's too difficult for him to stop. He actually described his daydreams as a hobby.

You might not think there's a problem with this but it has had a really negative impact on his life so far. He's lost all his friends, he's had to drop out of uni and has no social life whatsoever. The worst problem though is he has started talking out loud to the characters in his fantasy even when he's walking along the road/on the bus etc. He does get bothered by the reaction of others but he says it's too hard for him to stop himself. Does anyone else do this?

It's also virtually impossible to have a conversation with him lasting longer than about two minutes because he drifts off into one of his fantasies and can't concentrate.

Does anyone else have a problem controlling the content of their fantasies? Can they cause you anxiety if something happens you don't like and will this make you angry/aggressive? Eg My son has one fantasy where he meets his ideal girl but another lad comes along and steals her.

Has anyone successfully overcome their daydreaming problem and if so, how?

Any help would be really appreciated.

Thanks x

[Cordellia Amethyste Rose]

What you've described sounds very familiar.  Many people have expressed talking or making facial movements while they daydream.  I catch myself doing this, though I try to control it in public.  Sometimes I'll daydream about upsetting things, and they'll upset me.  I try to make myself stop after a few mins and make things right, though.  Have you read the literature and studies done on this?  You can find them on the links page.  If your son goes to another doctor, I strongly recommend taking the studies done.  He should be prepared to explain this to them as most docs probably won't have heard of it.  It's real, though.  In fact, it's being studied again right now.  Hopefully, he'll find a doc who's open-minded and willing to learn something new and try to help him.  Many people have expressed stopping or controlling this.  I only daydream less when I'm having a panic attack or when I'm just really busy in the outer world.   I've posted some tips people have suggested along the right side of the main page.  Tell him not to give up.  We all have to find what works for us.  

[Jeanne Colwell]

Thank you so much for your reply and for the work you are doing. I'll get printing!