How I'm curbing my MD hell.Caught between a rock and a hard place

[ratfish]

Well let me say first that I've recently made a change in my life and my MD has been spiraling out of control . Its been bad , and I've been feeling helpless and ..... a lot of bad feelings because of it.
So our brain is capable of growing new pathways. In the past to change negative thoughts which I had obsessively , I started paying attention, and every time I would say something negative to myself , I'd aim to replace it with something positive.
"I hate myself " became "I will practice loving myself and others" (by saying that immediately after the negative thought.)
Eventually the negative thoughts disappeared.
Our brain grows new pathways to accommodate new habits. That's how a habit is formed.
So I am applying the same logic.
Im catching myself when I begin to daydream
I replace the act
I immediately envelope myself in the feeling of gratitude for something in my external reality.
When my daydream puts me in a social situation , I immediately remove myself from it and become grateful for someone I know here. And I just keep doing it every time.
Being grateful for something parallel to the daydream makes sense.
Im very frightened right now though , it's why I'm posting this, to talk about it . I've been so enveloped in fantasy . It feels like a great boot has kicked me , and where I landed....
HURTS!! I am not prepared
It's better this way...
But I'm overwhelmed
I'm going through a major change in life . Makes sense MD would kick into overdrive.
There is another post on here about focusing on your emotions, what you are feeling. I feel this is key to freedom , but how do you cope???how do you face yourself?

[Silver Swan]

I really do relate and feel just as you do. MD was put me into turmoil and has spiraled me into deep shit. I'm also living between a rock and hard place. I am trying to quit doing MD. I teach myself to resist any nonsense the brings me out of it.
Whether its romantic relationships, adventures or achievements, I keep on denying this and turn my back against it, because I know it can't possibly be real. I was hurt so bad by the truth of where my life landed up, that I'm no longer the same gullible person I was before. These days, I sigh, stare and think. I still chat with myself, but it's only out of sheer frustration.
To be honest, I am far more into real life matters these days, such as world news and neighborhood scoop.

[ratfish]

I Just about had a panic attack trying that. Now it's like my MD is fighting back. Some tai chi helped to get me grounded some . Man ... I want to work on myself and heal some , but my mind won't let me stay in reality long enough!!!!!