Maladaptive Daydreaming: where wild minds come to rest
I hear many people are good at concealing their daydreams, but has anyone had trouble doing this? Just about everyone I've met noticed my peculiar reactions, and wondered why. A lot of people were good at finding out I was actually in other worlds, and were either very angry, super curious in a teasing manner or even appalled. They could tell with how dazed my eyes were, my inappropriate laughter, chit chat with "nobody", but especially when I just wouldn't listen to them. There were moments where I just wanted to sink into the floor, because it was so embarrassing.
I am actually stopping with the day dreaming, as its seriously effecting my reality. I noticed this, and it's so scary, but I lost all definition of myself and what my life actually means. I hardly ever talk to people, at all. So, apparently, I have to discontinue living in my daydream worlds. They did anything else, but give me a future. So, I am beginning to see as to why most everyone carried on that way towards me.
I've "talked to myself" most of my life. I'm able to do it in private though. My husband just chalks it up to one of my "quirks".
My parents notice a lot, especially my dad. They consistently point out "you're talking to yourself again" or "you're smiling to yourself". They can recognize when I'm in a daydream, but they don't know it's a real issue. My dad will usually joke, "I talk a lot to myself, too" or tell me to stop "being weird" jokingly. I always end up so embarrassed that I try to deny it. They'll sometimes pry and want to know what I was thinking about, and I'll honestly not always know because my train of thought will go to so many places and sometimes be kind of replaying a daydream until I edit it to my liking.
I used to think this was a "creative person" thing. It's kind of frustrating to know it spiraled out of control and that it's something my parents could recognize since I was in my teenage years at the very least. But oh well.
I envy those whose families and partners are easy on them about it. I live with a family that's the total opposite. My mother and sister find "my talking to myself" and "smiling to myself" very disconcerting.They'll be like, "What's that?" Whenever they show their discomforts, I feel very bad, so I wish I would stop. It's not that simple, as my daydreams keep on reoccurring.
I have been concealing it all my life. My wife doesn't know about it. I don't believe anyone does. At least that's what I think :)