Coping with/Deciding on making big changes to a main character

[SwanInTheWater]

Hi, I've been debating all week on making what I consider is a major change to one of my main characters. I want to for selfish reasons, but I am having trouble with it because sometimes it feels like I have to stick to these unspoken "rules" when it comes to daydreaming, and it feels a little bit like I don't have all that much control over what happens in my DDs, almost. Does anyone else feel like they have to stick to some rules? 

I know this is a decision I have to make for myself, but I was wondering if anyone else had to make a choice of whether or not to make a change to a character, and did you end up doing the change? Why or why not? The thing I want to change is the age of one of my longtime MC's daughter. He had her very young and in the DD I guess the reality of it all is becoming a stressful thing. It would be a little better if he had her even just five years later.  It is actually starting bother me. She's going to be 8 next month. But I feel like shaving a few years off her life will change the memories I have of the older DDs. I guess I could just replay them. I don't know. I've had these characters for so long that it feels quite real, and making a change in age like that almost feels like lying or cheating. 

[SwanInTheWater]

I hadn't even thought of trying it out for a while! I was getting so anxious about making a final decision right away. I like this suggestion. Like a trial run. Thank you. I will do that. 

Michelle Young said:

I am what I call a repeater. I run through my story lines again and again. I have definitely made changes over the years. Sometimes, I have trouble getting used to the changes. Sometimes, I might change things back. My main character had a brother and a sister when I first started. Years ago, I added a second sister who was born when he was ten. I also changed who the main character's father's father was (scandalous!). I fairly recently changed the sexual orientation of one of my MC's best friends. I have experimented with changing the year of death of two of the grandparents, although, I ended up changing those both back. It is hard to say why I make these changes. It just kind of happens as ideas occur to me.

I would just suggest that you play around with it a bit. Sometimes I will try something several different ways to see what feels right.  Try not to see it as lying or cheating. If you get used to the new way, you might really end up liking it better. If you don't, you can always go back. 

[Beth W]

Trial runs are great :)  I also talk to them about a change sometimes too, and if they seem disagreeable I try to convince them to see it my way.