Maladaptive Daydreaming: where wild minds come to rest
I am not psychotic because I know that my daydreams are not real. But they FEEL more real to me then my normal life. Thats why I do it, thats why I can't stop. I decide every day that Im not going to do it anymore, that Im going to live in my own reality and put that world behind me. But I never last long before Im back there. I don't physically see my daydreams or anything like that but I physically feel them. And what I feel is more intense then in my own reality. The best way I can describe it is that its like stepping out of a world of black and white to step into a world of colour.
I understand that. Mine don't feel more real than real life, but they certainly feel as real.
Sorry sara, I was responding to 1/2 a dozen different things online and ended up giving an incomplete and half arsed reply to all of them. The part I was agreeing with was:
I am not psychotic because I know that my daydreams are not real. But they FEEL more real to me then my normal life.
I have absolutely no problem keeping my various worlds straight. And hence in no way meet the criteria for psychosis. But the world that the body lives in has never been the more real of the worlds that I experience. I live in a number of worlds and the one that most reading this would consider to be the "real" world has always felt the least real to me.
When younger I attempted to go cold turkey and stop DDing completely more times than I can count. This always ended up making me even less functional in the "real" world rather than more. I have a number of other crazyies going on in addition to DDing. Over the years I have come to terms with it all and no longer see stopping DDing as desirable or even possible.
In my case an eating addiction is a more apt analogy than a drug or alcohol one. For some people stopping DD entirely may well be the way to go. My goal is to remove or at least lessen the Maladaptive aspects of my daydreaming.
I can't feel much in this world. None of it feels real anymore. My world is the only place where I feel certain in myself, where I feel completely at peace. I visit my world a lot via lucid dreaming and out of body experiences and every time I have to come back here I feel dead inside. I have a great family, a loving partner, a good future ahead of me (if I put the time and effort in) but I can't feel anything good towards it.
One of the people who features in my daydreams a lot is a hallucination I have it real life and sometimes I forget what things we have done in my internal world and what we have done in the physical world. I get muddled up between my realities. I've been psychotic, perhaps I still am. I know there is no proof possible that my world exists but it's the only thing I want to fight for and as I can leave my body and visit this world I will continue to do so and if belief in this world makes me crazy I am more than happy to embrace that.
I remember asking myself this exact same question a while back. Whenever I imagined physical contact with my crush I got sparks all throughout my body, but in reality it wasn't the same. I don't know why this is, but maybe depression has something to do with it as far as I've been told.
Mine feel real. In my DDs, I have emotions that I feel I don't have in real life. At the very least, if I'm not in them, I see said emotions displayed to vividly in the interacting characters. My characters love each other, they feel intense grief, etc. In real life I feel as if I cannot truly feel the emotion of love, though that could be what everyone tells me as "not finding the right partner". It makes sense, as I am only sixteen, but even so I look around and see many girls falling madly in love with seemingly anything that bats their eyes. Maybe anything that HAS eyes. I see relationships as a very computerized thing in real life, while in my daydreams they have so much depth that I crave for...
My real live verses daydreams aren't black and white verses color, it's more rounded 2D verses layered 3D.
i dont feel like i have any psychosis. I feel perfectly 'normal'. i know what is real and what isnt. but i agree with so many here..my DD world/worlds FEEL more real to me..or maybe i just want them to be real. as others have stated, i think i try to substitute what emotions and feelings i'm not getting in my real life. i want to be more than i am, and in my DD worlds I am.
I feel the same way. I know it's not real but it seems like it's more real. I feel like...I belong there, not here.