A little afraid

[Yelena Cheeli]

Next week I have an appointment with the psychiatrist.... And I don't know why, I'm a little nervous about it. I think having a diagnosis and making the whole thing official and at the same time starting some real treatment is making me sick to my stomach, even though that's all I want. Has anyone here felt that way too?

I am also a little confused on what to talk about and in what order to say things. Any light for me?

[Elaine]

I know I'm late to reply to this since I just joined, but I want to reply anyway on the off chance anyone else in the same position comes across it. After all, we're really laying the foundation for future MDers.

It's good to take things easy, and know you won't hit everything on the first session. It might feel like you didn't hit anything. It might feel like the wrong psychiatrist (maybe it should be a therapist instead). You might have to try several professionals before you find the right one (it might have to be online). But it's worth it.

I would just advise to go slow. Don't get overwhelmed by things you can't explain. If the right word doesn't come to you, put a pin in it. Write down where you left off, and if you think of what you wanted to say, say it next time. Recovering from MD can take the place of MD, in a way. Commit to learning the necessary vocabulary (dissociation, anxiety, depression, ADHD, autism/ASD, comorbidity, etc). Practice what you're going to say. Take your time; god knows MD can take plenty of it.

There are also discussions from people about their therapy sessions!

[Jessica Ballantyne]

When I was a young, bright and energetic 18-year old, feeling ready to embrace life and conquer life's opportunities, that I can put my creatively gifted mind to anything, I should've stepped back to realize—"It's not that I'm good at everything and don't have all the experience in the world. What do I know? How am I so sure I'm not going to fall or prove myself dead wrong?" How could I be so confident in myself, so early in the game, when really, I had no clue? 

Anyway, as I got older, I learned that I wasn't good at much else, all but being a visual artist. I tried my hand at all sorts of jobs and volunteer work, and it occurs to me that I suck at a great many things. Except for picking up the paint brush to do a landscape or portrait. 

It turns out, I'm not the worldly, knowledgeable, mature and multi-skilled grown up who I believed myself to be, my head was filled with illusions after all these years. It fills me with shame to a degree that maybe I should see a psychiatrist.