Hey :)

[Bryttani Nycolle Harris]

Hello everyone! I've been lurking around for a little bit but I decided to join and introduce myself and tell my story. This is the first time that I have ever came out about doing this and it feels like a ton better just knowing that there are people out there who do this! I guess before I dive in I should tell you a little bit about me!

My name is Bryttani and I am 15 years old. I go to an arts school and I play cello and harp. I actually have a competition in my orchestra tomorrow that I'm really nervous about. Anyways, my friends think that i am really funny and I have a lot of friends but I just love to lock myself in my room and play some MGMT, my favorite band, and surf the interwebz.

Okay, I guess it all kind of started when I was reading the Twilight series! I daydreamed at first that Robert Pattinson would come to the movies with me to go see Twilight, then that it was the premiere of the movie and I was his date and I would give interviews to the press and they would ask who I was wearing and I would say Oscar de la Renta and tell a story of how we're good buddies. Then it evolved to me being a famous actress and telling funny stories to the press about how me and John Krasinski have good times together! But it was mostly just that until my "character" gets shot 2 cm away from her heart and in her ovaries and is rushed to the hospital. She's in a coma for 2 weeks then dies for about 5 minutes then comes back to life. For some reason, I always replay that scenario with different people and different reactions.

I realize that I really don't have any characters, it's kind different versions of me that does different things. Also, almost all of the characters in my stories are celebs. I don't know why, but I think one reason might be that I'm really submersed in the world of music that I like and TV shows or movies that I like. Because sometimes I'll be like a writer for a movie and have like full movie plots and explain them in an interview. I sometimes try to get my mind off of it because I stay up late because of it and don't get much homework done. I've read that I should probably do something physical, but it's like everything "triggers" my reoccurring daydream. Sometimes, I'll act out these daydreams and pretend that I'll be feeding someone or talking to them like in an interview and find something in my room that can be the interviewer and just keep eye contact with it.

I daydream every time I can really. I'll be in school in the bathroom pretending I'm on the phone with my boyfriend and we're talking about random things like elephants or the shows that I like.

So yeah, that was pretty lengthy but I had this all bottled up for a couple of years now. I also have some questions though. Some people say that you can cure MD. Let's say that this was true and it was cured, since I daydream like a lot, what would I think about? That kind of popped into my head while I was typing. Anyways, have a good night!

[Nomad]

Thanks for posting. Your question got me thinking. I don't always like what I think about now that I'm not MDing as much--at least I'm not visiting my most intense and engrossing worlds. I probably started daydreaming because I didn't like what I felt (but I'm not sure because I remember doing it when I was four or five). Anyway, now I'm facing reality more  instead of fleeing, and its uncomfortable sometimes because I can't control reality. I've been angry at someone for a week--obsessed. Intellectually, I realize that I have more important things to think about than this wretched person who has offended me, but my mind keeps returning to him. It's a lot like MD used to be. Bummer. Part of me knows I can slip into a dreamworld and  escape, not necessarily from the anger but from the anxiety of the situation that's causing the anger.  But, I prayed to be relieved of my obsession with MD, so I want to accept what comes, even if it's an obsession with something less pleasant. I'm thinking this nastiness probably won't last forever.