Lights. Camera. Action.

Huge crowd cheering my name, security guards all around me, people asking me for an autograph or a picture. I go home, and find my best friend there, we soon fall in love, get famous, and make the best selling theater plays and films ever. 

That's one song. I sit down. 

Not real. It's all in your head.

Who cares? Put on another song. Flick. Flick. Flick. People follow me wherever I go.

Not real. All in your head.

Repeat that again. And again. And again. That'd be my life on a weekend, aside from the endless home works.

Healthy? I don't know. Stress releasing. Relaxing. Fun. Addiction.

I love arts. I love the theater. I've directed school plays. People say I do good. So then I ask myself, why not let it become a reality? I don't know. Or maybe I do. Too huge. Too scary.

Coward! , I tell myself. I wish I can stop being such a coward right now. 

When I am 'being the director', it goes away. Daydreams go away. I get too preoccupied. It's a good thing, or so I think. But in my daydreams, I AM a star. I can do whatever I want. What's the point of making it real?

Because it is not real and is all in your head.

What are the odds that I succeed?

You can do it. Prove that you are good enough.

What if I'm not? What if you are?

I hate the never ending battle in my head. No one else seems to have it. I hate it. I HATE IT. I hope I'll have the courage of facing it. But sometimes I hope I'm not brave enough. I ask myself why, and once again, I don't know. But of course,

Not real. It's all in your head.

It's all in my head, but is it really unreal? 

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Comment by Ipod on August 25, 2012 at 1:35am


By stressing out about it, you're making it into an issue.

You're not a coward, and if people think you're a coward, who cares?

Find serenity, not in a flight of imagination, but in confronting life in a calm manner. Steadily. 

Being famous or being respected are no guarantees of happiness. There's nothing wrong with being famous, but sort yourself inside first........... Focus on the present. Don't fret over who you are or how people perceive you.

Concentrate on how your trade can help people. And theatre does help people. If not theatre for you, that is fate. Nothing to get upset about.

Be relaxed but energetic/ serious but cheerful.

Be excellent.

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