testimony of maladaptive daydreaming cure

[Cristy Vite]

ok i will start saying i'm not american and i don't speak a lot of english but i will try my best to post this.. sorry about my bad english...

my daydreaming before the miracle was total, i did it all the time and i couldn't stop even if i wanted.

what happened is that i started to go to a christian church and i started to notice that other people who went to church started to heal from cancer and others diseases and on sunday before i went to church i said to god, "ok, my parents are getting divorced and i finish my career so i want to be healed, i don't know how are you gonna do this but you're gonna heal me , so i went to church and started to pray like the world was going to end and started to tell Him please heal me heal me and nothing happened and the sermon was over, so i went to a person and told her "god wants to heal me or not? i want an answer right now" and she took me and lead me to other persons who did a pray for me and said " father we ask you to heal her from this disease in the name of jesus" and then after that i felt confused and i thought i wasn't cured because i was still daydreaming but i noticed that if i wanted i could stop and i started to stop daydreaming... i realized god healed me from the syndrome but not from my vice so what i had to do was to stop daydreaming because i could do it if i wanted to or not.

it's been 9 months since god cure me and did the miracle...since i have the vice to daydream i started to daydreaming again and have the problem again but not the way i had it before, i mean i have this unstoppable daydreaming problem but now i just daydream about my real life and i can stop when i want.

i have to say this was not the fault of god, i was all my fault because he helped me and cured me, please don't judge me because i fall again into this drug, i know my treatment is not complete but i know i'm going to win... i feel guilty.. so guilty for doing it again... but i know that god maybe wants to understand me and help me again with this problem... all i want to do sharing my testimony is to help others to get away from this problem.. i don't speak a lot of english so i can extend more my speech but this is the best i can... if you have doubts about this i will try my best to respond you and try to help you! =)

[Katherine Milano]

hey Christy. My story is a lot like yours. God also cured me of not being able to control my daydreaming, and now I have complete control but I still choose to do it anyway. I just can't decide if it is bad or not. In the past it was definitely bad because it took over my entire life, but now I can do everything I want to do in real life because I can turn my daydreaming on and off whenever I want. I just need to get your opinion as a fellow Christian: Is maladaptive daydreaming a sin? Half the time I think it is and half the time I don't, and the result has been that I am scared to talk to God or that I pretend to be praying and talking to Him but I know that I am really not. I am so terrified, and sometimes it feels like I have chosen daydreaming over God and that is why I am afraid to speak with Him.

I know that God is with us in this. Thank you for your testimony, I know that you will succeed because you have God on your side.

[Cristy Vite]

thanx riley for your comment, i really hope i would get rid of this thing forever, i wish this for all the people who want to stop DD like we do, and i hope the best for all the people who want to use this to enhance their lifes, i'm working on myself to let the guilt in the past and i would like to know how this problem can help me instead of being an torment in my life, because i know a lot of us use this to help themselves to accomplish things that you want to do, i don't know maybe i'm just focused in the bad side of DD instead of trying to see what benefits can bring me.

[Cristy Vite]

thanx for the comment jasmin, i don't know how to handle this, i think i'm getting worse everyday, i don't want to punish myself for what i did (start to daydream again), so i'm just going to do the things i know i can do, achieve my goals. i'm not sure to view this as a gift, because it's afecting my life in so many ways, for example yesterday i was watching a movie with my friends and started to daydream (not about the movie) about helping people with this problem, i couldn't focus in the movie, i was trying, but i started to daydream unconsciously without even try it, i would see it as a gift if it only came when i wanted to, but i daydream when i don't want to.

you see, that's exactly what my therapist told me, that it can help me to make a novel or to be a writer, but i don't see the benefits because it's affecting my real life, and i want to focus, i would like to understand this. =)

[Jasmin]

Have you considered that DD is a gift that God has sent you and that you maybe could ask him for guidance how to use this gift to enhance your life without letting it take over?

Everybody in the world is unique and some special talents need skill and patience to learn how to master them. 

Whatever your path I wish you all the best. 

 

[Riley]

Please don't feel guilty and I hope everything turns out for you the way you would it to be good luck :)

[Cristy Vite]

thank you jennifer, i think i am gonna take a deep breath and try to calm down, maybe it's not my fault that i started to do it again, the only thing i need is to get rid of it.

i apologize because i said i was going to respond the questions about this blog, but unfountunately the internet is not helping me to stay focused in real life so i'm going to stop it for a while until i feel safe.