Horrible DDs and bad concentration...Oh, and hi!

[Margie W]

Hi, I guess this is a little
 rant intro.

So, Monday I was sick, staying home and avoiding school. Well, technically I couldn't get myself out of bed, which is a battle I seem to fight every morning because every time I wake up the daydreams take over. I never thought much of my daydreams, I have a bad memory so I can only remember a couple of years back in detail, but as far as I know my daydreams have been part of my life for a long time, just the way I think and get through day-to-day life without going insane and I thought everyone was the same as me. Yesterday though, for the one-too-many time, I was watching Dr Oz and started DDing that I had cancer. This creeps me out, I don't know why I do but this has become a common thing in my DDs. So I googled "are daydreams dangerous" and managed to find my way here.

From when I found out about MD, my DDs have been torturous, everything from people finding out and calling me a freak, to being used as a lab rat and being forced to take medication (I'm anti-medicine, I hate even taking panadol for headaches). I feel like things have gotten worse now knowing that I have this mental condition, I think it was better when I thought everyone was the same as me. What can I do now though? I can't just forget everything that I've read in the past 2 days.

I guess its good though, that I know about this. I mean, it's better than continually stressing over my low concentration levels and thinking that I might have ADD or something. At least now maybe I could try and watch out for when I start to DD and stop myself? IDK, I just know I got my report yesterday and well, I'm a smart girl but I'm getting low average grades, I need to get my grades up which means I need to stop my DDing.

One quick question while I'm ranting on, how do people without MD think? How to they get through problems? I mean, I can't even get through a maths problem the same way as my friends, I imagine the numbers and move them around in my head. Does anyone else do that?

I seem to be over my rant so another question, do people have particular times/places they DD that they haven't like planned? I know some people set apart times when they DD but I'm talking about times/places you just happen to DD in on a regular basis. I know I DD mostly in the morning (waking up, walking to busstop, bus, rollcall at school) and the night (shower and when I'm trying to sleep). Sorry, I like asking questions and reading answers.

And I'm sorry if I sound stupid. I'm really not stupid.