Hi Everyone!

[Alex Lasky]

Hey guys and gals,

So as you may have figured, I have MD and like many others on this site I have had it my entire life.  Unlike most of the people I have seen so far, I am extroverted and test as an ENFP on the Meyer's Briggs test.  I believe that my MD was triggered in my childhood during the long stretches of loneliness I experienced due to being an only child and having two very career oriented parents.  I wasn't abused or anything like that (my parents are wonderful people) but they were gone a lot on business trips.  My first week home alone was when I was 8 years-old, my first cross-country airplane trip alone was when I was 10 years-old, and my first summer alone was when I was 12 years-old.   Because I was moved every two years during elementary school I had very few stable friendships so I ended up resorting to imaginary friends, worlds, and realities to keep my busy mind stimulated.  I feel like this is all coming off a little tragic, but I actually rather enjoyed my fantasies and didn't realize how bizarre my childhood was until later in high school.  In fact, I thought that everyone had the same extensive fantasies until I was caught in a few embarrassing situations involving me unconsciously making noises, in front of other people, during a daydream.  My MD started to become a problem in high school when I would disassociate throughout the announcement of a test/project/assignment and would then come into the next class totally unaware of the project.  This happened so often that my parents took me to a psychologist who ran a number of tests and diagnosed me with ADD (trying to explain that it was caught so late because of my "high IQ score").  I remained unconvinced and found that the ADD medication didn't really help and made me feel like crap.  My issues with MD peaked in my freshman year of college when I was dealing with depression, a toxic relationship, and more responsibility.  Instead of dealing with my problems I withdrew into my daydreams and essentially lost a year of my life.  I became so dissociated that I actually don't have much memory from that period of time but I know that I lost 40 pounds and  failed everyone of my classes that semester.  I was placed on academic probation and nearly had to drop out of college altogether.  This became the fire under my ass that I needed.  I managed to pull out of my dissociation with reality and ended my relationship, worked on my depression, and got serious about my classes.  Without realizing what it was, I gradually learned how to manage my MD by reducing triggers, pursuing my passions, and keeping up constant stimulation.  This worked for years and my life gradually recovered.

Now I'm 26 years-old and a graduate student in public health.  For graduate school I had to move into a house by myself.  During this time I have found myself falling back into my triggers (music, anime, and video games) and having dissociating daydreams that can last for hours.  With my extra time, I have been trying to channel these fantasies into writing, but I'm still a huge noob at fiction writing and it gets me frustrated.  As I started to struggle with MD again, I began to do serious research into my "symptoms" to see if I wasn't the only person who has experienced this.  After a few scares looking at things like schizophrenia, bipolar, and dissociative identity disorders I finally stumbled upon MD and, for the first time, feel like I have FINALLY found out that this is a real thing and even better... that I'm not alone.  I hope that finding this site and talking about my MD will help be get back control of my imagination.  I have never been able to talk about my MD before and I am so ready to be able to open up to like-minded people!   

   

[Rachel]

Hey, Alex! I'm so glad you found this site. Like you, I also moved a lot during elementary school and because of that, suffered from a lot of loneliness during my childhood and struggled to make friends. You seem like a pretty cool person, and I hope you find this place very helpful and welcoming! I've made several long-term friends on this site. The chat room is a great place to make friends.

I hope to see you around!

[Roel]

Hey Alex :D Welcome!

They gave me mediaction for AD(H)D too. It was terrible lol. Didn't work at all and just made me feel terrible. But I took it for years, for some reason :/

Very glad to read you turned your life back around and managed to get this far :) I'm taking you as my example now hahaha. I'm a college freshman rightnow and man it's difficult.

Fiction writing is very hard for me to do too but I love to do it and actually my biggest dream is to write a novel about one of my daydreams one :D

I hope we can help you fighting it and you will not fall back completely. My advice would be to fill your lives with hobbies to prevent yourself from daydreaming. But to be honest I never had a succes in reducing my daydreams XD

Anyways nice to meet you :)

[alona]

Well, we're always ready to share stories and help and be helped. Welcome, Alex!