Hello

[T.S.W.]

Just an introduction really 

I have been addicted to fantasy and daydreaming since around the age of 6. 

I never realised so many people have similar kinds of experiences. I am prone to pacing around, muttering to myself, gesturing with my arms, lost in fantasy and reverie, with often very detailed and elaborate fantasies about situations or people playing out in my head. 

I think it all started seemingly harmlessly enough - I would imitate scenes from films and television shows as a kid, running around, talking to myself - but you're a kid so it is all put down to "he's just imaginative" and "he seems happy". However, I never really grew out of doing this - sure, I don't run around in front of people like I use to, and I don't tend to play our fantasies about film or television, but i still lose myself in  idealisations and fantasies about the past.

I think a key difficultly with these sorts of addictions or compulsions or however you want to frame them is that there are intimate and also not simply bad or negative - fantasy can be an important part of growing up as you form your own sense of self, and being imaginative can be a really useful or special ability. I grew up with someone who had a eating disorder and I think, similarly, it has been hard for her to overcome this addition because, well, she has to eat, yet the very thing she has to do is also the source of her problems. Similarly, using imagination is an essential ability, and  I would not want to stop having the capacity to imagine and fantasise about things in life (I think it has actually been quite helpful). At the same time, imagination and fantasy have been the driving forces behind my dissociation from uncomfortable, difficult or painful emotions, and I really feel that my habit has had a significant impact on my relationships: so much energy, isolation and time goes into intense fantasising and daydreaming, and sometimes I would rather fantasise and daydream than actually converse with people. 

Anyway, I am really appreciate to have found this network. 

[Valeria Franco]

Welcome! Imaginary is a talent. Addiction to imaginary is almost a curse.

I always compare it to wine. It's lovely if you have a fine taste for good wine, if you are able to find the hidden chocolate notes or the wood smell in a glass of red wine, if you can pair it with food in a  way that make food even more enjoyable. But. If you become addicted to alcohol... there's nothing lovely any more. It's a nightmare and all your life is affected.

So, I think what we really want is to get rid of the addiction, not of the dreams. I managed it.