Dark Daydreams

[Soul Dreamer]

I haven't been on this site for very long, but it seems like most people daydream of a better life, or of being better. Some have an idealised version of themselves, a dream crush, or both. I can see why that's addicting, living inside an amazing world with amazing people.

My daydreams aren't like that. I have no idealised version of myself, no better life, and no dream crush. The easiest way to describe my daydreams is dark. Every daydream I have is filled with violence, betrayal, pain, or loneliness, or a combination of such. So why am I addicted to them? I have no idea, and they make me feel like some kind of creep. I seem to take pleasure in building up relationships between characters, and then crushing them, and to force my characters along this roller coaster of intense emotion.

No, I didn't have a traumatic childhood, and no, I don't enjoy others pain or anything. I'm a vegetarian! I hate seeing others in any kind of pain. I just don't get it. *Sigh*.

It's for this reason that I desperately want to quit daydreaming, not to just get it under control, but to end it permanently. I have tried creating 'ideal' lifestyles, but something happens along the way and before I realise it, everything is dark again. I adore my characters, but I hate my daydreams.Maybe I'm just addicted to my characters.

Either way, I want to and will get rid of both them, and the daydreams they belong to.

[Floris]

Whenever I DD about violence, it's some kind of vendetta or very aggressive self-defense .I can get scared reading newspaper articles about lone men (sometimes very vulnerable people like elderly or handicapped people) getting cornered and beaten up/mugged/humiliated (often by muslim youth)...terrible things that piss me off.  Also I have been bullied in the past and sometimes fantasize about getting even, totally beating up the bullies in a furious, controlled rage and with more power than I had back then. It's certain things that trigger me to think about these bad things. They're kind of unsolvable problems (since I'm no hero that could defend himself with superpowers) so I try to stay away from looping thoughts about them.

I have read that rage can sometimes express itself in dream form as an open, gaping wound. Rage can destroy yourself but you do need an outlet I think. Some form of physical exercise would probably help you really well.

Maybe you want your DD's to be believable and therefore paint them black. Because cynicism seems more realistic at times. It can be self-hatred perhaps, believing that everything would fail anyway because those characters represent a part of you. Remember that the more emotional part of the brain is more pessimist, while the rational part is more optimist!

[Alex Moon Glow]

Interesting, the story  of  my main DW is something like a really long movie/book plot which consists of adventures, laughts, stuggles, suprises, fear, sadness , violence, joy, happiness .....It is pretty much like life, a more exciting version of life where you know that everything will be alright in the end.

And I don't enjoy playing with people's emotions either, can't stand watching someone suffer. And I am a vegetarian too by the way!

Perhaps in cases where it is does not start after a traumatic event it doesn't have to be a perfectly  happy world. DDs can be much more than just an escape from bad feelings. It can be used to analyse different situations, explore options. You can see the damage caused by different actions and learn from it while causing no real harm. It could be as Wish said- a way to understand pain/a sad or scary movie.

Either way you should not be ashamed by your DDs. Daydreaming about violence and pain does not make you any less kind. And yes, it can be very weird and confusing.

[Iris]

OK, it was just a guess.

[Soul Dreamer]

I don't think its a suppressed part of me because I can be extremely argumentative and stubborn, and I already do martial arts as well as soccer.

[Iris]

Maybe your dark side wants to be seen. To me you seem to be a too good girl. Can you express your needs and can you say "No"? Are you a good obidient daughter? Maybe martial arts would do you good.

I don't say you should start fighting and quarreling with your relatives, but listen inside yourself and hear what you need.

Don't get a guilty conscience about these dark fantasies.

[Rachel]

Mine are negative like that too! Though I do have positive daydreams as well, mostly at night, my negative daydreams involve violence, betrayal, pain, loneliness, and much more too, just like you said about yours!

[Haleigh]

Mine has a mix between good, and very, very bad.

[ashlee]

my daydream has idealised versions of myself, dreams crushs, and what not, but they are not perfect. 
My daydream can be dark at times, with topics such as depressions,drugs,self harm, eating disorders (no one in my daydream currently has an eating disorder) and stuff like that. I feel that there imperfections make them more perfect

[Wish Upon A Wish]

Not all but a lot of my DDs are quite negative too (and I'm a vegetarian too!) I think for me it sort of helps me understand pain, I guess, and deal with my own mundane things. Also, like watching a sad or scary movie, we feel the emotion but because our brain knows it's not real, we can enjoy it. Or something like that.

[Pascale]

You are not alone. There is a group called "Negative Daydreamer" take a look at it.