I’m not even sure where to start. I’m new to all of this and I still question whether what I’m going through is actually MD but it only seems to make sense. I’m 23 and I think this started when I was around 10/11. I remember it soon after watching X factor and JLS had just lost. I started to act out certain things in my head and obviously anyone looking at it would think it was a little girl having a innocent crush on her favourite childhood band. But I Imagined and planned my life around the four boys actively pretending that we were all friends and that I was in this life with them. I’m 23 now and it changes with whatever obsession I’m going through at the time in my life. I’ve had multiple different versions of life in my head. A few names that I’ve done this with is Wentworth Miller, Eminem, Justin Bieber, Hero Fiennes Tiffin. I’m really worried that this will never go away and I will constantly act like I have something with these people and never be happy in my own life because I’m so content with acting all of these scenarios out.  Does anyone have any advice. I’ve never seen any stories relating to celebrities so I’m starting to think I’m the only one. 

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Comment by Maeve on November 6, 2020 at 3:51pm


forgive me if I’m doing this wrong but I don’t know how to reply individually to people. 
Tal- I definitely act out by facial expressions and talking. I definitely try to not beat myself up about it but sometimes I just feel embarrassed that this is how I act. 
jenna- it is emotionally draining. I will cry over things that I’ve made up in my own head and that has never actually happened or existed. It’s scary 

Victoria- that is exactly how I am too. Shy and introvert whereas in my dreams I’m extremely confident. It’s difficult to deal with. Knowing I can be confident in my head but too afraid to actually act on it in “real life” 

Comment by Tal on November 5, 2020 at 2:09pm
Hey Maeve- giving my two cents here.

If you look at the clinical definition for MD, it often includes physically “acting out” daydreams in some way - facial expressions, talking, etc., listening to music, and some form of rhythmic movement (I.e. pacing, rocking, etc.). Do you experience any of those when you’re imagining these scenarios?

Regardless of whether you “fit the definition” or not (there actually isn’t an “official” diagnosis anyway) if you feel as though your obsessions are controlling of your life, there are some things you can do to feel better about these obsessions.

I had MD for about 22 years of my life. The biggest piece of advice I have—— don’t beat yourself up so much for doing it. I would spend hours locked away pacing in my room and be so ashamed until I realized 1. I wasn’t doing something which was hurting anyone 2. I wasn’t doing anything that was physically hurting myself and 3. In many ways, this was my “creative” outlet. Think about it- it’s basically like writing and directing a story- just in your head.

There were times when it completely took over my life- I would avoid family, friends, and that was the hardest. If you feel that’s what’s happening, I totally get it.
Comment by Jenna on November 5, 2020 at 9:45am
I do the exact same thing, I have elaborate characters that I have created and act out for any television show, book, or movie I have grown emotionally attached to. It’s super emotionally draining because I can’t just enjoy a show, I have to obsessively try to figure out how to involve myself in the plot. I do it all day. I definitely relate to the worry that it will never go away, I’ve been doing this since I was little and it’s only gotten worse with time.
Comment by Katharina on November 4, 2020 at 12:31am
Me too, my md has always been made worse by this. I have only just discovered that other people are suffering too, I thought I was the only one crazy in this way. I am really grateful too that I have a word for it now. This helps very much with talking about it.
Comment by Victoria on November 3, 2020 at 6:53pm

HI, I totally get you because I do this all the time for the past 5 years. I just got accepted to blog on this place and the few posts that I've read don't talk about MD on celebrities so I'm glad I've found you, I thought I was the only one. These dreams, beside making my biggest wish come true (meeting celebrities and having a good relationship with them), also reflect an idealized version of me. You see, In real life I'm shy, have trouble talking fluently, feel uncomfortable all the time, have no talents, etc. while in those dreams I become this really cool and sociable woman, confident and with many talents (like making music, dancing, directing, etc). I don't know some day I will post on my page more about this when I have time or the right mentality to do it. 

Comment by Helix on November 3, 2020 at 5:16pm
I used to do that too, but it was with fictional characters from popular shows and stuff. I think it's pretty much the same.

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