A creative outlet?

[Caolán]

Hi, my name is Caolán and this is my first post here. I'm glad to finally find a community where I can openly talk about these episodes with people who have experience. I have been experiencing Maladaptive Daydreaming since I was 5. Usually my episodes consist of pacing around my room any where from 4-6 hours a day (if I'm home, when I'm out and about with friends or family I usually don't experience any episodes). I thought this was normal because I used to take dance and that would be the best way to choreograph a dance piece when confined to a smaller space (like my room). It wasn't until a couple weeks ago where I decided that I really needed to investigate my behaviors. I was worried at first because I was afraid that I might have schizophrenia, but as you know the expierences in my daydreams aren't actual hallucinations, but rather an intense feeling. I remember some of my episodes, but to write them out would require at least 10-20 pages per episode (I have writing them out in full detail before). While I do believe that a lot of the time of day is wasted on these day dreams. I believe that we could all channel this energy into something creative, and something beautiful. Like no other normal person has ever seen. If you guys have the time of day (if your time isn't being occupied by pacing around your room lol) I would like to hear some of your guy's experiences! I want to limit my MD episodes to about one hour a day, and take 2 hours to try and document what I am envisioning. I know that some might be scared of these episodes but know that no matter what, you have complete control, and that you are still grounded in reality. This is a psychiatric disorder, not a psychotic one. I know that breaking the addiction is hard (especially when you go balls deep into the rabbit hole), but it is not impossible to escape it. I have been diagnosed with anxiety, depression, and ADD/ADHD, and while all of this may be factual, these are just symptoms of something much larger.