24/10/12

[Liam]

                Whilst sitting here on YouTube watching a video of the best bits of the Ricky Gervais podcasts, a section about Karl Pilkington starting his diary came on. (After almost dying of laughter) I decided I would be interesting to begin my own diary, with this being my first entry.

                The day began with a chicken sandwich on wholemeal bread. The poultry was questionable, but what do you expect from Tesco’s own, thin sliced, one pound fifty for a thousand slices sh*t. After the usual walk to the uni, I proceeded to “contemporary issues in psychology”. The lecturer was one which I had not yet been lectured by; a rather large, round woman with brown curly hair. She preached about how we should make up our own minds on which aspects of the subject to believe and pursue them. Sensible advice. Ironically, she was rather forceful in her beliefs; “slagging off” anything unsupportive of her personal (probably deluded) paradigm. After constant, minimally educating rant on parenting (of which she admitted to having no experience), she explained to us that only a minority of psychologists believe what she does (thank god). I left feeling considerably more tired (and slightly disturbed) than when I entered.

                Walking home, I reached the bridge I routinely walked under and reached into my pocked for a small amount of change as I anticipated the possibility of a homeless woman who is sometimes there. She appears to be around thirty five and after feigning bankruptcy a number of times, I was struck by a feeling of premature guilt I would inevitably experience if I turned her down again. Seventy pence, it’s not a lot, but it’s enough not to insult. Anyway, she wasn’t there.

                Got home, decided I’d make a curry with my “Tesco’s cheap-range” chicken and a jar of tikka massala sauce. This decision was immediately followed by another; one which advised against the former and to have a pot noodle, a banana, an apple and a couple of biscuits. I’ve grown very fond of this voice, he seems to understand me. What? It’s weird? No...Surely not.

[lizzy dagger]

Haha! Tesco's cheap-range chicken. And you think in voices sometimes? 

That homeless woman sounds like somebody to stay away from though.