It’s a lie. A big lie we tell ourselves everyday

Maladaptive daydreaming the biggest curse in my life I have been imagining every differ scenario that k wild want . I am sooo behind in life that i can’t even describe to anyone of y’all. That’s what md does suck out the entire potential will of a person , and now im lower than any of the years before and seeing everyone go so high and successful in everything else . I don’t know how it started I just know it has to end , and I have not been daydreaming since two days already feels like a win. Everytime you feel you are getting sucked back remember you will get stuck remember everything that md has done for you everything bad , all this life wrecked because of what . My father had alchoho addiction and it was just crazy because I could see how just because of alchohol he ruined his entire life , and that’s exactly what happened to me. And I’m just so sad because all my life I saw that and promised myself I would never be this. But the high of md it gives me so much assurance that my future will be good. False assurance I would say.  Because it’s not true how much ever your brain tells you look what I have to tell u about ur future you say no it’s not true . It. Won’t come true . It’s a false image you are showing me and I won’t fall. Now it’s building my life from scratch but I’m ready I will show up everyday to face this bloody addiction and get out of it . I will get out of it . Test me all you want god. I know what I can control and what I can’t . And some things I can’t . Like I fear if I’ll ever be loved and I can’t ever control that nor can I ever replay my partner cheating on me to relive the moment and be prepared. If I overcome this addiction I’ll be prepared for anything in life . I am stronger than this. The future this shows is false it’s false . I saw another user and I’m going to keep updating everyday just to be accountable 

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Comment by Jessica Ballantyne on Thursday

My daydreams lied to me after all these years. If I was a way more realistic person with self-confidence and determination, my life would've looked better today. I used to have so many fantasy boyfriends, but wish that I woke up and worked on getting a real one! Problem is I was a very shy person and had trouble approaching others.  I got made fun of a lot for being so very quiet. So fantasies were all I had to myself together. Regardless, MD took away my focus in life to improve my issues. Now I stagger into the future dealing with the same problems I faced for the past 30 years. Don't fall for MD, it will just suck you in, and cause more harm to you life. I avoided having imaginary boyfriends, because they are no real, you eventually lose interest in them. Meanwhile, you struggle to climb up the ladder in the career and friend zone. I now have to pick up where I left off, and hope succeed in the end, without anybody's help. 

Comment by Tan on Wednesday

I don’t know you know sometimes I feel I’m 21 and I feel there’s still so much hope if I leave this habit o much to do ofcourse it’s going to be extremely difficult to not daydream. I usually daydream when I hear about someone else’s life and them doing way better than I am. And then I imagine I have a boyfr. Wohhooo now I’m one up them , my brain is satudfied in that only and in this game of one up I lost everything 

Comment by Jessica Ballantyne on May 12, 2024 at 5:54am

Yes, I have many times. Sometimes I wonder if he could be for real, and out there somewhere. In my MD life, I do have a BF or hubby. But in reality, I really don't know how to approach others. So my relationships are fictional and have been for a while now. 

Comment by Tan on May 11, 2024 at 9:53pm

Did you also daydream about someone loving you , a boyfriend or a husband ?

Comment by Jessica Ballantyne on May 10, 2024 at 2:52pm

I can relate to what you're going through, and it's also happened to me. MD has swallowed my life, and put me into a situation I never wanted from the start.
I actually thought it was giving me hope and assuring me that my future will be great. Think again, it did no such thing, and I even payed for it. Everybody and my family just noticed that I was "someplace else" and reacting to my daydreamers, watching my eyes stare into an invisible world they couldn't see. I had no idea how detrimental MD can be and was going to find out sooner than later. It effected my life decisions, self-motivation, work ethic, attention span and communication skills. Just like you, I fell behind, watched everybody live successfully, and assumed that I live in such a rutty situation, probably because I deserve it—for living on another planet. I remember everybody expressions and reactions towards me daydreaming, at first, when I lived in my head, I thought they were picky. Now I realize they thought I was being dreadfully weird and my absence of mind and nonsensical actions were raising eyebrows. Maybe to them, I wasn't normal at all—and seriously needed help. When you are in the midst of MD, you can't tell, because you live in your head. You're immersed in a fictional realm that pulls you away from your real existing life, distressing the one's you love. Even though I stopped MD, my life is in pieces, and I need to pick up those pieces and put them together. 

If you want to hear something shocking. My younger sister is brilliant, well educated, on her way to a successful profession, and talks like a pro. She makes me appear and sound like I'm still taking my baby steps—I'm 38. I'm extremely quiet and keep to myself a lot. Nobody would know how truly clever I am. 


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