Sorry to intrude - question for MD'ers

[Laura N]

My mother was an MD'er (I found our through her journals).  After piecing her whole life struggle together I wrote the following blurb about her.  Basically I tried to drill down to what I thought was her ROOT issue to look at. 

Does anyone else who is an MD'er feel connected to anything below? Just curious if my mother's MD was just a symptom of a larger issue or was MD the root...

I am addicted to dependency.  Nothing my partners have ever heard me say or seen me do can be trusted as representing my true motives.  My true motive is to use people to keep myself taken care of.  I want my needs to be met by other people and I will use anybody who is stupid enough to fall for it to get it.  It makes me hate my partners.  They are stupid and weak.  I hate that I have to play a monkey and song dance to keep my position with my partners.  I have built up lots of anger because of this game and there are times it just needs to come out.  I know every time I am pushed to be more responsible and independent, I will set out to sabotage that and create a story of why it wasn’t my fault.  It is all part of the game. And I know that each time my anger breaks to the surface and we do a sorry/forgive cycle it makes it that much harder to maintain my position next time my anger comes out, which causes more anger.  My relationships are doomed from the start because I am going about them all wrong. 

While I appear to be intelligent and capable, I am too sick to be in any relationship. 

[Yukia]

Hi Laura and thanks for your post.

Maladaptive daydreaming can never be the "root" as you put it.

First, it's a form of escapism that grew disproportionately large by outliving the original source of stress or trauma, thus becoming a compulsive behavior. It's merely a smoke and not the fire.

Secondly, if your blurb summarizes your mother's journals correctly, then the problem is clearly with her own refusal to take personal responsibility and speak up for herself. She sounds immature and rather narcissistic to me.

[Kalliope]

Yes, I concur 100% with Yukia. Nothing in this blurb sounds like MD would be the reason. Yukia very, very well described it, it's the smoke, not the fire, and the fire is some trauma or stress. The first thing that sprang to my mind is codependency. Did you check that out?