MD: what's the key to de-obsessing your mind?

[MDphonehome]

hi all,

just discovered I very probably have MD, I just meet all the requirements, the obsessive fantasizing, being a hero, doing grand things for humanity, etc, etc... when I look at it from a distance (in one of those rare moments....) I think my thinking is actually very obsessed with 

a) myself: my desires, frustrations, angers, irriatation

b) the future: always seeing a bright future full of succes, money, stardom , etc, etc

well the thing is, I really have been dreaming about having a stellar career in music since I was a child. But since my MD is so all over the place, it's also hard to ' just get to it', meaning, just practicing and doing all the practical things you have to do to just keep on rolling'. Cause in the background there's this grand fantasy about me finally making that big time breakthrough and also revenge fantasies about absolutely ridiculisering the people that have never ever taken me seriously for one second or have never given me a break. 

and since these fantasies are sooo 360 degrees VR-like, with all sounds and emotions too, it's hard to just snap out of them, cause the thinking is so obsessive and all over the place. 

I mean, I do meditate, and yes it helps for a while, but Geez, this condition is really something. 

Hope you guys understand me and can maybe give me some kind of advice...

best

[Kitt Coltrane]

When your MD interferes in your life, you may need some help. Therapy would be a good start to figure out how to differentiate between real life and fantasy so the effort you put into daydreaming or vengeance fantasy’s can be shifted into you actually practicing, networking and building your career.

[Mike]

It’s tough because it becomes an automatic response to a lot of things for me, mainly emotionally. So I know what it’s like for it to take over without noticing. The only thing you can do is recognize it and try to stop as you’re doing it. After that repetition, it’ll start getting a little bit easier. It’s all about breaking that cycle.

[MDphonehome]

yeah, my guess was it is a slow recovery. Sometimes I get like an epiphany that takes away part of the MD'ing, at least it seems...the point is, the MD sometimes takes over without me noticing it. In my case, it seems also to be connected with strong (and irrational) fears of 'not making it' and 'losing the point of my life'. this causes me to react very neurotically to situations, because the underlying emotion is fear. For instance in my desire to be financially idependant (in order to finance my own career and be a STAR), I've lost tons of money not realizing that in order to invest properly, you actually have to be really objective and free of emotions...sometimes reality kicks in really hard..but I guess that's part of the process....

[Mike]

I know exactly what you’re going through. It got to the point for me recently where I realized how much of my actual emotions I was putting into it and it’s started to affect my life. It’s tough, I know. It’s an obsessive compulsion, like a part of you you can’t live without. I just started on the road to recovery, so I’m probably not the best at asking advice. But one thing that has helped is forcing myself to stay in the here and now. My MDing came on a lot of times without me even realizing it. Know when it’s happening and just keeping forcing yourself to stop. Start small and let it build. I can already feel it making a difference, like my emotions are slowly becoming unattached from it. Hopefully this works for you!