November 2012 Blog Posts (105)

Many versions of self?

Alright, so...here's the deal. I know that there is the "idealized self" aspect to MD, but have you ever had...14 different versions of yourself? Kind of like you make characters, but well, with yourself I guess. The thing was, that the other versions of myself were never really...created by me. They kind of just...appeared. Although this is also how I get most of my characters...you know, they kind of just...appear. What different between the…

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Added by Solaina on November 14, 2012 at 6:30am — 6 Comments

I met someone like me!

On Saturday Bryn and I were on the tube returning home after going out for lunch. There was a young boy sitting across from us with his grandmother. After about five minutes of him staring at us, he got up and sat beside me. He introduced himself as Isaac and asked where we were going. I told him we were going home, and he responded by saying his grandmother was taking him to the Museum of Natural History to see the dinosaurs. I talked with him for a while and he asked if I could go with him…

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Added by Gethin on November 13, 2012 at 2:17pm — 3 Comments

A Glamorous Affliction? A Light-Hearted Struggle?

This is something that has been bugging me for a while now.... But, just to be clear before I start, not ALL of my friends have reacted in these ways. I've been trying to be more open about this with my closest friends, and have even begun outright telling some of them. So far, the overwhelming reaction to my explanation of what MD is?

"Oh, really?? I think I have that, too!!"

At first, every single time, I get very…

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Added by Erin on November 13, 2012 at 7:25am — 4 Comments

HELP- Too attached to characters (real people)?

Okay, so I hope I'm not the only one, but I can only daydream about real people. Sometimes minor characters change, but for over 2 years, I have daydreamed about the same two people's relationship. They broke up over a year ago. I don't really want to say who, but I feel like I kind of have to to explain this... I'll just say they are on YouTube, if anyone watches vloggers or whatever... I used to daydream about others, and they may sometimes change a little, but I have become so attached to…

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Added by Grace on November 12, 2012 at 7:29pm — 5 Comments

Introductions, or, Busy Minds Numb Souls

Hey, guys... This is going to wind up being more of a personal vent than any sort of productive conversation starter.... Just warning prospective readers ahead.

Well, let's start in the present, shall we? I'm currently behind on more than half of my work in my college courses, most of which have to do with writing, one of the loves of my life. I'm constantly fading in and out of my relationships with others, sometimes not answering people's texts/phone calls for days at a time…

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Added by Erin on November 12, 2012 at 5:33pm — 1 Comment

MD: more common than we think?

it's been awhile since i last posted!

there some reasons why i haven't been on this site as much, the biggest one being that i'm kind of over the whole "wow i have a disorder, i need to find out everything about it" thing. i've came on here and asked all my questions in my blog posts, i've gotten my answers, and i'm not really as curious about how other people deal with MD.

if you forgot, i'm a MD-er in high school and i have had MD since i was 9. i prefer to pace or lie down…

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Added by debbie downer on November 11, 2012 at 9:30pm — 3 Comments

Cold Turkey Attempt 2- 12 hours in!

Hi,

Havent blogged before but here goes.

Ive just started at university doing geology and just dont have time to daydream anymore. So ive decided to stop completely for at least a month to see if I can convince myself I dont need to do it anymore. This is my secont attempt at this, last time I lasted 13 days before breaking, this time is different. I have stripped my room of epic posters with people on them, only maps and abstract images remaining and have put signs up…

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Added by Amy on November 11, 2012 at 11:53am — 3 Comments

abandoned characters

i have this character who used to be the main point of my daydream. like, she was my "main" character for like, 3 years. last couple of years though i focused more on her friend and her friends, so i hardly ever daydream about that character anymore. like, she makes an appearance occasionally, but it isnt the same. I cant even daydream about her anymore as much because im too into my new daydream. but then i notice i have alot of characters that i forgot existed.  i feel like i should…

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Added by ashlee on November 10, 2012 at 6:46pm — No Comments

All Good Things Come to An End

Today I finally got the guts to read one of the last issues in a  big trigger for me. There will be no more of this series which made me feel incredibly bitter sweet. I loved that manga to death and to see it end like that made me realize so much. All good things do come to and end. I have gone already deleted that world but still go back and forth every once in a while and currently can't take my current world. The manga left of on a bitter sweet cliff hanger only making me sadder. It got…

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Added by Jenna on November 9, 2012 at 6:24pm — 4 Comments

Sleepovers and MD

Im going to sleepover with two of my friends tonight and im really worried. I dont know if ill be able to talk to my friends all night long without having to be alone and daydream for a while. I dont have that many sleepovers because i havent really been wanting to socialize much, but i really do want to go and have fun. What should I do?

Added by Grace on November 9, 2012 at 12:12pm — 3 Comments

Figured out why I MD

My main problem is that I am not 100% confident in myself. Some moments I feel okay- but many others I do not feel confident. I pick myself apart and constantly see every flaw. It's getting really old. When I MD, its a way to reassure myself and feel confident. I wish that I could quit looking in the mirror obsessively. I wish I would quit comparing myself to others. It's like I know that I am being too hard on myself and I don't have much room to complain. But I still obsess over…

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Added by lizzy dagger on November 9, 2012 at 7:15am — 2 Comments

Character reunion

Just thinking out loud here. I was thinking (trying to stave off falling into a deep daydream plot) about the different characters in my DDs. What if they all were brought together, like a reunion.  I have different character sets, for different types of DDs. Certain ones only in the future dreams, some from different settings in the past. They would all be dressed very differently based on their time frame. I picture the scene from Bill and Ted's excellent adventure where all the historical…

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Added by greyartist on November 9, 2012 at 5:50am — 2 Comments

What do people think about?

I've just recently learned about this, but I am positive I have it, and have since as long as I can remember. I cannot stop. I do it constantly, and its starting to affect my grades. I have great friends and parents, and have had no trauma that could have triggered it, but I just find life sort of... dull. Nothing exciting ever happens to me. I don't enjoy talking to my friends anymore, I'd rather go off into my world and just daydream. I don't even dream about myself... I don't want…

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Added by Grace on November 8, 2012 at 7:30pm — 2 Comments

Courage

If there's one thing I know about conquering MD, it's that it takes courage. Facing the scary things in life that I haven't wanted to look at or feel, and have been trying to escape from takes courage. Building a life from scratch that I've let crumble away takes courage. Feeling the shame from wasting years of my life living in my mind, and moving forward anyway takes courage. Choosing the uncertainty of reality over the secure stagnation of fantasy takes courage. This virtue is key to… Continue

Added by Laura Gardiner on November 7, 2012 at 11:25pm — 2 Comments

"The Asylum"

Hello there, everyone.

 

I am Jennifer, and I am 15 years old, (for those of you who are new) and I would like to share a poem I wrote about living with MD. I don't know if you'll be able to relate to this because it's pretty much based on personal, inner feelings about my case of MD, and how it feels to know I live with something considered a mental disorder. This…

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Added by Jennifer on November 6, 2012 at 8:00pm — 7 Comments

kids

i know alot of people have said they've been in love with a character, but have you ever had love for a child in your daydream?

im not in my daydream, but my characters (in the future) have children and i daydream about their relationships with them often.

i dont know, i love them alot (in a parent way or like a sibling, not a pedo way LOL) 

Like, im 17 and i dont have kids or anything but i feel like i know what its like to be a parent

i just want to play with them ahhh…

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Added by ashlee on November 6, 2012 at 7:48pm — 4 Comments

I love you guys

Truely I do. I am glad to meet people who are just like me and someone I can relate to and reach my had to. Thanks everyone for helping me with my problems :)

Just wanted to say how much your advice and opinions matter to me

Added by otakugirl on November 6, 2012 at 3:32pm — 4 Comments

I will change the word.

It seems a crazy thing to say. But still, if you look at it on another way it is the only intelligent thing to think. Don’t misunderstand me I don’t think I am Jesus or James Bond and I will save the word. I just know I can make a difference.

I decided for some years ago that if I can’t change the world I can change myself. But if I manage to change myself, I will have changed the word. And I did, I mean, I’m still MDD, I have many issues but it’s a lifelong project, but I keep…

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Added by Pascale on November 6, 2012 at 3:00am — No Comments

A Particularly Creative Sort of Suffering.

“Suffering is justified as soon as it becomes the raw material of beauty.”

~Jean-Paul Sartre

Edgar Allan Poe and Vincent van Gogh; two coincidentally rhyming names that will weather history, signed upon the fantastic works of art by the men who bore them. It was…

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Added by Greydawn on November 5, 2012 at 7:18pm — 2 Comments

I surrender

I just can't fight anymore. I don't want to try. MD has finally took a real toll on me. Laid in bed late DDing, so heavy today. Barely noticed hubby kissing me goodby as he left. I feel like a robot, get in the car start the mindless drive. Lost in the DD world, bright morning sun blinding through the window. Mind skipping around, road, work, DD story line, road, sky, sun, DD character talking to me, work, time- I'm late, etc, etc, then WHOMP! what was that? where am I? What just…

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Added by greyartist on November 5, 2012 at 6:49am — 6 Comments

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