The1andonlyAbber's Posts - Wild Minds network2024-03-29T02:37:03ZThe1andonlyAbberhttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/The1andonlyAbberhttps://storage.ning.com/topology/rest/1.0/file/get/12283134472?profile=RESIZE_48X48&width=48&height=48&crop=1%3A1https://wildminds.ning.com/profiles/blog/feed?user=0fkqclbmim3o6&xn_auth=noReturning here after a LONG timetag:wildminds.ning.com,2023-11-02:4661400:BlogPost:4307912023-11-02T15:27:04.000ZThe1andonlyAbberhttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/The1andonlyAbber
I first joined this forum when I was 14 or 15. I used to be super active on here, reading every new post and commenting a lot. I became much less active when I was 16 and my MD took a turn for the worse. Since the daydream was partly augmented reality based, I almost never had to shut it off, and it got to the point where I didn’t want to discuss MD much because I didn’t want to dwell on the fact that it wasn’t real.<br />
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When I was 17, I completely recovered. (More on that later, probably.) I…
I first joined this forum when I was 14 or 15. I used to be super active on here, reading every new post and commenting a lot. I became much less active when I was 16 and my MD took a turn for the worse. Since the daydream was partly augmented reality based, I almost never had to shut it off, and it got to the point where I didn’t want to discuss MD much because I didn’t want to dwell on the fact that it wasn’t real.<br />
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When I was 17, I completely recovered. (More on that later, probably.) I thought about coming back to make a post describing my recovery, but I don’t think I ever did. I wasn’t sure if I wanted people to copy the things I did to get better because I didn’t know if my recovery would last.<br />
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To make a long story very short, it only kind of lasted. I have a lot of trauma from my childhood and adolescence, and sometimes it makes me want to hide from everyone and everything. I don’t believe I fit the clinical definition of MD anymore, but I believe that I use fiction as an unhealthy coping mechanism, whether it’s watching shows that I know will make me upset because I have a parasocial relationship with the characters or having daydreams that aren’t addictive but otherwise very MD-like. I’m hoping that by coming back here, I can find support and be held accountable to try to cope in better ways.A Few Things I'm Thankful For (Belated Thanksgiving Blog Post)tag:wildminds.ning.com,2014-12-02:4661400:BlogPost:1968102014-12-02T04:38:22.000ZThe1andonlyAbberhttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/The1andonlyAbber
Hi everybody! I've been on this site a lot lately, but it's been a while since I made an actual blog post. This blog post is intended for me to belatedly express my gratitude.<br />
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I have a lot to be thankful for. We all do, actually. But seeing as you've probably heard lots of rants about about food and water and "roofs over our heads" from relatives over Thanksgiving--believe me, I did--and I'm assuming you probably don't want to hear another one (not that we shouldn't be grateful for those…
Hi everybody! I've been on this site a lot lately, but it's been a while since I made an actual blog post. This blog post is intended for me to belatedly express my gratitude.<br />
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I have a lot to be thankful for. We all do, actually. But seeing as you've probably heard lots of rants about about food and water and "roofs over our heads" from relatives over Thanksgiving--believe me, I did--and I'm assuming you probably don't want to hear another one (not that we shouldn't be grateful for those things), I'm just going to talk about stuff related to maladaptive daydreaming and this site.<br />
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Some things to be thankful for:<br />
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1. First and foremost...the Internet! I NEVER would have found out about MD without it! Actually, is there anyone on here who DID'NT find out about MD from the Internet?<br />
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2. My awesome imaginary friends. They're always there for me no matter what, and they always cheer me up when I'm sad. Imaginary people are much more loyal than real people.<br />
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3. This website. It's helped me tremendously. Where else would we be able to discuss MD with people who actually have it?<br />
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4. This community. (Should this technically be part of #3?) I love how kind and respectful everybody on here is. Stay awesome, everybody! (Especially you there reading this! Yes, you!)<br />
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5. @Cordellia Amethyste Rose, because she does such an awesome job of maintaining said website and keeping trolls and spammers out of said community. Keep up the good work! We appreciate you a lot! :-)<br />
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6. People researching MD. Honestly, where would we be without them? They were the ones who discovered this condition in the first place. Also, we won't be able to make maladaptive daydreaming an official diagnosis without a lot of research being done first.Rather sadtag:wildminds.ning.com,2014-06-09:4661400:BlogPost:1844512014-06-09T02:38:51.000ZThe1andonlyAbberhttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/The1andonlyAbber
The story in my mind right now is, in my opinion, one of the coolest stories ever. Which makes sense. It was designed specifically for me to enjoy. While I daydream, there is a small part of me that is simultaneously fangirling.<br />
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I've thought about writing my daydreams down, but they're WAYYYY too complicated, and contain tons of characters from books and TV shows that already exist (and would be difficult to disguise as original characters). Changing that would ruin the story for me,…
The story in my mind right now is, in my opinion, one of the coolest stories ever. Which makes sense. It was designed specifically for me to enjoy. While I daydream, there is a small part of me that is simultaneously fangirling.<br />
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I've thought about writing my daydreams down, but they're WAYYYY too complicated, and contain tons of characters from books and TV shows that already exist (and would be difficult to disguise as original characters). Changing that would ruin the story for me, though.<br />
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I've told my dad about my daydream storyline (and I inform him of any new developments), but I rarely am able to go into very much depth.<br />
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Sometimes I wish I just had someone else to geek out with about the TV show in my head, but there is no one. I am a fandom of one.My crazy daydreamtag:wildminds.ning.com,2014-06-06:4661400:BlogPost:1843492014-06-06T04:02:11.000ZThe1andonlyAbberhttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/The1andonlyAbber
I used to have like, 20 daydreams, but they were all very shallow (and I kind of outgrew then) so they got boring and I got rid of them. Then I found a new daydream. I like it so much that I don't really have any other daydreams because I don't think they would be as good as this one. The new daydream is a combination of all the best parts of my old daydreams, plus some brand-new stuff. In my daydream, my character is me but a different species (we'll get to that later). My character lives in a…
I used to have like, 20 daydreams, but they were all very shallow (and I kind of outgrew then) so they got boring and I got rid of them. Then I found a new daydream. I like it so much that I don't really have any other daydreams because I don't think they would be as good as this one. The new daydream is a combination of all the best parts of my old daydreams, plus some brand-new stuff. In my daydream, my character is me but a different species (we'll get to that later). My character lives in a strange old mansion at the edge of town (which is basically my house with some extra wings slapped onto it) with her siblings, parents, relatives, and some family friends. My character's best friend Zach (the son of one of the family friends) accidentally caused a huge radiation leak. Afterwards, my character and everyone else in her house has superpowers--they're able to fly and shoot electricity from their hands. Everyone assumes that this is because they have mutated from the radiation accident. They're surprisingly calm about it. Then my character's 8-year-old little sister breaks into a science lab and uses the machines there to make a clone of The Doctor from Doctor Who (my character knows him). Tony, someone else who lives with my character, is kind of a mad scientist who has his own lab. He decides to analyze DNA samples to see what the mutations from the radiation accident were to see if they made us smarter. He found out that we were actually a different species all along and the radiation accident just caused certain genes to activate and that was why we suddenly had powers. We were clearly a genetically engineered species--our DNA was the DNA of a bunch of alien species (and a bit of human DNA too) stitched together. Coincidentally, this is around the same time that Tony and some of my other friends figured out how we could build our own spaceships. So we end up going on a huge quest through space. The people that genetically engineered us left us clues saying that there were 4 other species with different superpowers scattered around the universe and that we were meant to go find them so we could build an empire together as part of a huge experiment. Our species was called the Administrators. our role was to conquer the planets for the empire and rule over the other species.We found the other species, but because we had been apart for so long (the genetic engineering began long before my character was born) our cultures were totally different, so we weren't so sure that us all living together would work. Then we found out more about the aliens that genetically engineered us. They were called the Doloreans. Their species was REALLY advanced. They had "outgrown" (meaning, they thought they were too good for) war, religion, emotions, and pretty much everything, so they just did experiments just because they were bored. All of the 5 species were really mad when they found out. No one would have minded living in an empire with the other species if the experiment was for something important, but they didn't want to have their lives controlled so much just because some self-righteous aliens were bored. So, each species just went and did its own thing. My character's species founded their own empire, the Oakstream Empire. My character became queen, even though she was only 14 at the time, because her parents wanted to act like humans from Earth. Even though my character is in charge of a space empire, her parents still force her to live on Earth. Well, it later turns out the Doloreans WANTED the 5 species to just do their own thing. They wanted to see what it would be like for someone to rebel against them and how they would react if they knew they were being manipulated. My character and her friends are trying to figure out if the Doloreans are still trying to control them. But she has other worries--a secret organization from Earth has infiltrated the US government (which has an alliance with the Oakstream Empire). The secret organization has starships and they're going to invade the Oakstream Empire and try to take over. The Oakstream Empire knows the invasion is coming but they don't know when. My character doesn't know it yet, but it turns out this was also engineered by the Doloreans. Meanwhile, scientists from Earth have stolen samples of my character's DNA and have used it to make a clone of her, but she doesn't know about this either. So yeah, I daydream about crazy sci-fi stuff.Maladaptive Daydreaming and Being Injuredtag:wildminds.ning.com,2014-03-12:4661400:BlogPost:1763352014-03-12T03:32:50.000ZThe1andonlyAbberhttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/The1andonlyAbber
I injured myself yesterday during gym class. I dislocated my knee. It popped back in right away, but in the process of popping out and then in I probably injured a ligament. This has happened before, but the doctor thinks that this time I probably injured a different ligament and might have chipped my bone. I had to go home early and go to the hospital. Today during school it was actually hard for me to daydream. Probably because adapting to being on crutches takes a lot of attention. I got an…
I injured myself yesterday during gym class. I dislocated my knee. It popped back in right away, but in the process of popping out and then in I probably injured a ligament. This has happened before, but the doctor thinks that this time I probably injured a different ligament and might have chipped my bone. I had to go home early and go to the hospital. Today during school it was actually hard for me to daydream. Probably because adapting to being on crutches takes a lot of attention. I got an MRI after school. Ironically, it was actually fun because I could finally concentrate on my world and was able to stay there for a full half-hour. I got a lot done today (in what I call Imaginary Friend World)--I climbed a mountain and discovered a new species of butterfly, even though in Imaginary Friend World my knee is also injured due to me being attacked by a monster.So I told my parents about my Maladaptive Daydreaming, and...tag:wildminds.ning.com,2014-03-08:4661400:BlogPost:1758942014-03-08T05:04:19.000ZThe1andonlyAbberhttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/The1andonlyAbber
It actually went okay! :-D Surprisingly, they believed me right away. I explained it to them and they understood (not at first, but I'm pretty sure they understand now). They said it's okay that I don't want to be cured yet and that I should set goals for myself such as paying more attention to people, etc. I didn't tell them about my friends knowing I have it, though. I'm really glad I told them. I feel so much better now. Thanks for all the support guys :-D
It actually went okay! :-D Surprisingly, they believed me right away. I explained it to them and they understood (not at first, but I'm pretty sure they understand now). They said it's okay that I don't want to be cured yet and that I should set goals for myself such as paying more attention to people, etc. I didn't tell them about my friends knowing I have it, though. I'm really glad I told them. I feel so much better now. Thanks for all the support guys :-DI'm Telling My Parentstag:wildminds.ning.com,2014-03-07:4661400:BlogPost:1757502014-03-07T04:20:46.000ZThe1andonlyAbberhttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/The1andonlyAbber
I'm going to tell my parents about my maladaptive daydreaming tomorrow evening. I was planning on telling them tonight, but my dad wasn't home tonight, and I want to tell both of them together. I don't want to keep a secret this big from them. Plus I told some of my friends, and I don't think it would be right for my friends to know and not my parents. I found some really good articles on Maladaptive Daydreaming that I printed out to show them. Please share any advice you have about telling…
I'm going to tell my parents about my maladaptive daydreaming tomorrow evening. I was planning on telling them tonight, but my dad wasn't home tonight, and I want to tell both of them together. I don't want to keep a secret this big from them. Plus I told some of my friends, and I don't think it would be right for my friends to know and not my parents. I found some really good articles on Maladaptive Daydreaming that I printed out to show them. Please share any advice you have about telling them. Please also wish me luck, and pray for me if you are religious. I'm REALLY nervous about this (I almost had a full blown panic attack yesterday from thinking about it), and I will need all the support I can get. I will post another blog tomorrow letting you know how it goes. Thank you.3 possible reasons for me having MDDtag:wildminds.ning.com,2014-03-02:4661400:BlogPost:1753242014-03-02T04:23:38.000ZThe1andonlyAbberhttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/The1andonlyAbber
My bad childhood: Okay, so I wasn't exactly abused or anything. I guess things could have been worse. But my childhood was still awful. About half of my memories are of disappointment, loneliness, stress, my parents arguing, and being bullied.<br />
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Needing a creative outlet: I was (and still am) VERY creative. I also have an extremely powerful imagination. Most of my daydreams are of things that could never be accomplished in real life, or at least not in my lifetime, such as living on another…
My bad childhood: Okay, so I wasn't exactly abused or anything. I guess things could have been worse. But my childhood was still awful. About half of my memories are of disappointment, loneliness, stress, my parents arguing, and being bullied.<br />
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Needing a creative outlet: I was (and still am) VERY creative. I also have an extremely powerful imagination. Most of my daydreams are of things that could never be accomplished in real life, or at least not in my lifetime, such as living on another planet (that has dinosaurs on it) or having superpowers. I make a lot of art and stuff (and I also did when I was little) but my creativity just never seems to run out. It's useful and nice, but sometimes it gets to be a little hard to contain.<br />
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Heredity/ genetics: It's possible that my dad could have the disorder, too. He says that he has an imaginary island and always imagines that he's in a cabin in the woods before he falls asleep.What I did today :-D (dream world and real life)tag:wildminds.ning.com,2014-02-21:4661400:BlogPost:1740842014-02-21T02:40:58.000ZThe1andonlyAbberhttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/The1andonlyAbber
Real life:<br />
-Messed up big time on a really important project in art class. We were making pinch pots. Everyone's pinch pot, EXCEPT FOR MINE, turned out beautifully. I messed up on pretty much every single thing we were supposed to do to make the pot, so it turned out terrible beyond description. The weird thing is, I wasn't even daydreaming the entire time I listened to the teacher's instructions and made the pot.<br />
-Nothing else out of the ordinary really happened<br />
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Fantasy world:<br />
-Went wake…
Real life:<br />
-Messed up big time on a really important project in art class. We were making pinch pots. Everyone's pinch pot, EXCEPT FOR MINE, turned out beautifully. I messed up on pretty much every single thing we were supposed to do to make the pot, so it turned out terrible beyond description. The weird thing is, I wasn't even daydreaming the entire time I listened to the teacher's instructions and made the pot.<br />
-Nothing else out of the ordinary really happened<br />
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Fantasy world:<br />
-Went wake boarding :-D (I've never been wake boarding in real life except for in Wii Sports Resort)<br />
-Rode on a jet ski :-D (never done that in real life either)<br />
-Still felt like swimming, so I went to a water park :-D (I've been to lots of water parks, but this one was cooler than any water park that exists in real life)<br />
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*Sigh* The real world can be so boring and hard compared to the world of my imagination.Finding Out I Had MDDtag:wildminds.ning.com,2014-02-20:4661400:BlogPost:1740582014-02-20T04:35:54.000ZThe1andonlyAbberhttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/The1andonlyAbber
Sorry if my writing sounds a little weird, I'm tired and a little bit sick.<br />
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Okay, so when I was little, I LOVED to play pretend. Well, most little kids do, but I REALLY loved it. It was pretty much the only thing I ever played, and I always took it to the next level.<br />
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Fast forward to age 10: I was misdiagnosed by a school counselor as having an "imaginational over-excitability disorder", but no one believed him because he was always diagnosing kids with serious disorders when there was nothing…
Sorry if my writing sounds a little weird, I'm tired and a little bit sick.<br />
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Okay, so when I was little, I LOVED to play pretend. Well, most little kids do, but I REALLY loved it. It was pretty much the only thing I ever played, and I always took it to the next level.<br />
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Fast forward to age 10: I was misdiagnosed by a school counselor as having an "imaginational over-excitability disorder", but no one believed him because he was always diagnosing kids with serious disorders when there was nothing wrong with them. I told my mom that I was still a bit concerned, because I was starting to notice that the other kids spent most of their time in the real world and I didn't, but she told me not to worry. I still knew my imagination wasn't normal, though. However, I started to think that something was wrong with EVERYONE ELSE because they DIDN'T constantly fantasize. (I was kind of narcissistic at that age.) I never called my daydreams daydreams, I just called them "games".<br />
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Fast forward again to age 14: At this point I grew up and stopped being so impatient with people that didn't have as great of an imagination as me. I was looking on Yahoo Answers at some questions people asked about what age people should stop having imaginary friends at, because I was getting a little bit concerned about the fact that I was 14 and had all these imaginary characters, some of them left over from my early childhood. This one girl on Yahoo Answers said she was 16 and still had a bunch of imaginary friends, and she was asking if that was okay. One person in the answers said "Hey, that sounds like what I have. It's called maladaptive daydreaming, blah blah blah." I decided to look it up online. At first I was like "Ha! That's so stupid! That's probably not even real!" (This was probably due to my experience with the school counselor when I was 10. And I actually don't think whoever asked the question had it, what she was describing sounded totally different.) A few days later I decided that maybe I had been wrong and started to get curious about it. I looked maladaptive daydreaming up again and gradually something dawned on me. They didn't mean daydreams, they meant elaborate fantasy worlds. Where you can imagine every detail and the storyline just flows naturally. I realized that my "games" were daydreams. Funny how much, yet how little my life has changed since I discovered that 3 weeks ago.My head feels bigger on the insidetag:wildminds.ning.com,2014-02-18:4661400:BlogPost:1736702014-02-18T15:08:16.000ZThe1andonlyAbberhttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/The1andonlyAbber
Does anyone here watch Doctor Who? (It's a huge trigger for me but I still watch it, LOL.) Okay, remember that one episode where The Doctor gets a distress signal from another TARDIS and ends up in a "bubble universe"? Remember how that one woman there gets possessed by the TARDIS? She asks "Is this how old people feel? Bigger on the inside?" Or maybe you don't watch Doctor Who but you play/watch Pokemon. You know how Pokeballs are really small, but they can hold enormous creatures? My point…
Does anyone here watch Doctor Who? (It's a huge trigger for me but I still watch it, LOL.) Okay, remember that one episode where The Doctor gets a distress signal from another TARDIS and ends up in a "bubble universe"? Remember how that one woman there gets possessed by the TARDIS? She asks "Is this how old people feel? Bigger on the inside?" Or maybe you don't watch Doctor Who but you play/watch Pokemon. You know how Pokeballs are really small, but they can hold enormous creatures? My point is, that's how I feel. My brain feels bigger on the inside. It holds the lives of hundreds, maybe thousands (I've never counted) of people who don't really exist. It's full of entire made-up planets that I somehow know almost every detail of. And it still has more room. New things are being added to my fantasy universe almost every day. How is that possible?