Windy City Day Dreamer's Posts - Wild Minds network2024-03-28T21:59:05ZWindy City Day Dreamerhttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/WindyCityDayDreamerhttps://storage.ning.com/topology/rest/1.0/file/get/3145239598?profile=RESIZE_48X48&width=48&height=48&crop=1%3A1https://wildminds.ning.com/profiles/blog/feed?user=09tprse6ewyqt&xn_auth=noSelf Caretag:wildminds.ning.com,2019-05-28:4661400:BlogPost:3404122019-05-28T00:40:51.000ZWindy City Day Dreamerhttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/WindyCityDayDreamer
Sometimes I daydream so much that I forget to do self-care. Taking meds, multi vitamin, turmeric. I read somewhere that the same areas where people developed Alzheimers is the same area where people daydream. It freaked me out so I started taking turmeric. India has one of the lowest rates of Alzheimers- it is thought turmeric in the Indian food may reduce inflammation. Flossed my teeth. good toothbrush cleaning. Trying to get back to reality. Clawing my way back out of the quicksand of MD.
Sometimes I daydream so much that I forget to do self-care. Taking meds, multi vitamin, turmeric. I read somewhere that the same areas where people developed Alzheimers is the same area where people daydream. It freaked me out so I started taking turmeric. India has one of the lowest rates of Alzheimers- it is thought turmeric in the Indian food may reduce inflammation. Flossed my teeth. good toothbrush cleaning. Trying to get back to reality. Clawing my way back out of the quicksand of MD.Going backtag:wildminds.ning.com,2019-05-28:4661400:BlogPost:3401382019-05-28T00:25:45.000ZWindy City Day Dreamerhttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/WindyCityDayDreamer
I had quite a binge on MD this weekend. My heads hurts. Going to read a book now on “Gifted Education.” My son is gifted - trying to get out of the MD mode and into the real life mode. One moment at a time. one day at a time. Going back to reality.
I had quite a binge on MD this weekend. My heads hurts. Going to read a book now on “Gifted Education.” My son is gifted - trying to get out of the MD mode and into the real life mode. One moment at a time. one day at a time. Going back to reality.Againtag:wildminds.ning.com,2018-03-02:4661400:BlogPost:2810122018-03-02T05:52:02.000ZWindy City Day Dreamerhttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/WindyCityDayDreamer
I have started MDD again. Feeling guilty about it. Recognizing it is just part of recovery. I think tomorrow if I have the urge to daydream I I’ll read a book
I have started MDD again. Feeling guilty about it. Recognizing it is just part of recovery. I think tomorrow if I have the urge to daydream I I’ll read a bookMaladaptive Daydreaming and Cluttered Housetag:wildminds.ning.com,2014-04-08:4661400:BlogPost:1784972014-04-08T04:04:11.000ZWindy City Day Dreamerhttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/WindyCityDayDreamer
<p> I am finding that when I go on a MD binge that I don't take care of the house like I should. Dishes pile up. Piles of dirty clothes. Not picking up after myself. Then, I come off my binge and then try to detox my house. </p>
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<p> I am finding that when I go on a MD binge that I don't take care of the house like I should. Dishes pile up. Piles of dirty clothes. Not picking up after myself. Then, I come off my binge and then try to detox my house. </p>
<p></p>Day 3- How Much Is Too Much?tag:wildminds.ning.com,2013-08-20:4661400:BlogPost:1545582013-08-20T15:30:00.000ZWindy City Day Dreamerhttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/WindyCityDayDreamer
<p>For anyone, trying to stop MDing or curb it... the question we ask ourselves is when does DDing turn into MD. How much is too much? Should I not DD at all because it could lead to MD? Can I still DD but try to put limits on it? Am I capable of putting limits on it or does it become a slippery slope? Should I just avoid my favorite MD scenarios that lead to bingeing where I daydream for hours on end? How do I manage this? </p>
<p> Dr. Eli Somér who first proposed the phrase,…</p>
<p>For anyone, trying to stop MDing or curb it... the question we ask ourselves is when does DDing turn into MD. How much is too much? Should I not DD at all because it could lead to MD? Can I still DD but try to put limits on it? Am I capable of putting limits on it or does it become a slippery slope? Should I just avoid my favorite MD scenarios that lead to bingeing where I daydream for hours on end? How do I manage this? </p>
<p> Dr. Eli Somér who first proposed the phrase, "Maladaptive Daydreaming is extensive fantasy activity that replaces human interaction and/or interferes with academic, interpersonal, or vocational functioning." I think in determining how much is too much, a person with MD has to do an analysis of how MD has affected them in their personal and professional lives. </p>
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<p>Below is my analysis. MD has most affected my personal life. I would rather DD in the evenings then spend time with my husband after my son goes to bed. I don't socialize much as I would rather MD. I have only a few close friends. I don't call my Dad that often as in my spare time I would rather MD. In my professional life, I DD often in the morning which causes me to start work later. I could be more efficient and end my day sooner at work so I can spend time with my family in the evenings earlier. Also instead of MDing, I could work on my writing. One day, I would like to be a professional writer.</p>
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<p>Now, I understand better how MD has affected my life. So what am I going to do about? I think the next step is set concrete goals on how I am going to improve my personal and professional life. Instead of MDing, I will substitute some of my DD time to engage in personal and professional activities of my choosing. Below are my goals:</p>
<p>1. General Long Term Goal- Strengthen Social Ties with Family and Friends</p>
<p>Specific Measurable Mini-Goals</p>
<p>a) Call my Dad every weekend</p>
<p>b) Spend quality time with husband at least three nights a week</p>
<p>c) Go out to lunch or an outing once a week with a friend</p>
<p> </p>
<p>2. General Long Term Goal- Become a Professional Writer</p>
<p>Specific Measurable Mini-Goals</p>
<p>a) Read a "Book in a Month" by Victoria Lynn Schmidt, Ph.d- August</p>
<p>b) Research Novel/Take Notes on Ideas for Plots and Characters- September</p>
<p> c) Create Detailed Outline for Novel- October</p>
<p>d) Participate in National Novel Writing Month <a href="http://nanowrimo.org/">http://nanowrimo.org/</a>- November</p>
<p>e) Revise Novel- December, January, and February</p>
<p>f) Have a few trusted friends read it- February</p>
<p>g) Revise it based on feedback- March- April</p>
<p> </p>
<p>By taking steps towards the above-mentioned goals, I will be reducing my DDing time and targeting the areas where MD has affected my life.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>It is great now that I have set these goals- but what can I do so I don't engage in self-sabotage? I think then you have to have an understanding as to what are your triggers. Below is a list of my triggers:</p>
<p>1) Certain Kinds of Music- Particularly Pop Music</p>
<p>2) Reading about Celebrities on the Internet</p>
<p>3) Anxiety Attack</p>
<p><br/> Now, I have to think about how am I going to control these triggers.</p>
<p>1) Music- Listen to music other than pop music. I have some local music (indie music) that doesn't trigger MD. Classical doesn't either. If I want to listen to pop music then it has to be when I am on the elliptical and then I have to stop DD when I am done. Also I like to sing and I don't MD when I sing. I may need to sing more than listen. If this doesn't work, then I will have to stop listening to pop music altogether.</p>
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<p>2) Instead of reading about celebrities on the Internet, do research related to my novel idea instead.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>3) Journal about what I am feeling if I have an anxiety attack and take medication daily.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>To do this, I think I will need a support system. I am telling the MD community about this- you are part of my support system. I will also tell my husband.</p>
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<p>What happens if I slip? Well, I am not going to feel guilty about it or beat myself up about it. No one is perfect. As long as I am trying, I am not failing. </p>
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<p> </p>Day Two- Creative Urgestag:wildminds.ning.com,2013-08-20:4661400:BlogPost:1542772013-08-20T02:34:49.000ZWindy City Day Dreamerhttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/WindyCityDayDreamer
<p>I haven't really had any major withdrawals from MD, yet. I noticed that I am having creative urges. For example, I was walking my son to daycare and I looked intently at a tree and the grooves in its bark - they looked like wrinkles - I wanted to take out a pad and just draw every indentation, curve, valley, peak, shading of the bark of the tree. I have never taken an art or drawing class. I think I may just do that one day- just sit by a tree and draw it. Maybe take a drawing class.</p>
<p>I haven't really had any major withdrawals from MD, yet. I noticed that I am having creative urges. For example, I was walking my son to daycare and I looked intently at a tree and the grooves in its bark - they looked like wrinkles - I wanted to take out a pad and just draw every indentation, curve, valley, peak, shading of the bark of the tree. I have never taken an art or drawing class. I think I may just do that one day- just sit by a tree and draw it. Maybe take a drawing class.</p>Day Onetag:wildminds.ning.com,2013-08-19:4661400:BlogPost:1543362013-08-19T03:11:58.000ZWindy City Day Dreamerhttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/WindyCityDayDreamer
<p>I thought I would experiment for the next thirty days and do my best to not MD. Today, there was no MD. It was difficult as I was walking around the park with my son in his stroller and I wanted to daydream. Instead, I felt the hot scorching sun on my face and watched other parents with their kids. My son is only 22 months but he always wants to try the playground equipment that is really for older kids. Really admire his adventurous spirit and his confidence. I normally now would turn…</p>
<p>I thought I would experiment for the next thirty days and do my best to not MD. Today, there was no MD. It was difficult as I was walking around the park with my son in his stroller and I wanted to daydream. Instead, I felt the hot scorching sun on my face and watched other parents with their kids. My son is only 22 months but he always wants to try the playground equipment that is really for older kids. Really admire his adventurous spirit and his confidence. I normally now would turn on some music and MD and then go to sleep. I picked up the book "Gilead" at Goodwill today. It won the Pulitzer Prize a few years back. I will read that instead of MD. Enjoying some Toad Hollow pinot noir as I write this. </p>
<p>I figured that since I am not MDing this month or at least trying not too- that I will need to get more social this month. I joined a mom's group on meetup.com which is really active. They have one event planned where they are going to Richardson Adventure Farm which has Orbiting. This is where you put yourself in a 11ft giant ball- it looks like a blown-up hamster wheel but for adults- you just run around in it. I am really excited about that. </p>
<p> </p>Bingetag:wildminds.ning.com,2013-08-17:4661400:BlogPost:1539682013-08-17T18:35:33.000ZWindy City Day Dreamerhttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/WindyCityDayDreamer
I am coming off of a daydream binge. I had a fight with my husband the other day and it sent me into a binge. Sometimes he can say some real hurtful things. I am trying to come out if the binge. MD can be like a black hole that keeps sucking me in. I feel safe in the black hole. I can easily go to MD and feel better and comforted.
I am coming off of a daydream binge. I had a fight with my husband the other day and it sent me into a binge. Sometimes he can say some real hurtful things. I am trying to come out if the binge. MD can be like a black hole that keeps sucking me in. I feel safe in the black hole. I can easily go to MD and feel better and comforted.Making DD Productivetag:wildminds.ning.com,2013-08-11:4661400:BlogPost:1534252013-08-11T21:16:11.000ZWindy City Day Dreamerhttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/WindyCityDayDreamer
<p>I am not sure if I will be able to get rid of MD completely but I hope to try to manage it. One thing, I have been doing is DDing while exercising. I DD with music while I am exercising on the elliptical. I end up staying on the elliptical longer as I don't want to stop DD. lol This way I have been getting my DD fix but I am also getting healthy.</p>
<p>I am not sure if I will be able to get rid of MD completely but I hope to try to manage it. One thing, I have been doing is DDing while exercising. I DD with music while I am exercising on the elliptical. I end up staying on the elliptical longer as I don't want to stop DD. lol This way I have been getting my DD fix but I am also getting healthy.</p>Improving My Batting Averagetag:wildminds.ning.com,2013-08-11:4661400:BlogPost:1533402013-08-11T21:08:56.000ZWindy City Day Dreamerhttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/WindyCityDayDreamer
<p>I guess someone from the outside looking in would not think MD has affected my life. I am an attorney at a Fortune 500 Company. In addition to my JD, I have two master degrees. I have been married for 17 years and have a son. BUT MD has affected my life. I think I could have more friends than I do now if I wasn't devoting my extra time to DD. Although I did keep in touch with my mom over the years, I should have called more - but she is dead now from ovarian cancer. I also would keep…</p>
<p>I guess someone from the outside looking in would not think MD has affected my life. I am an attorney at a Fortune 500 Company. In addition to my JD, I have two master degrees. I have been married for 17 years and have a son. BUT MD has affected my life. I think I could have more friends than I do now if I wasn't devoting my extra time to DD. Although I did keep in touch with my mom over the years, I should have called more - but she is dead now from ovarian cancer. I also would keep the house picked up more. I probably would have written the novels I had wanted to write about but instead I MD'ed instead. Maybe I could have used that time to have more quality time with my family. I also think from a big picture standpoint - I wondering if I am fulfilling my "life's purpose." Am I really "living my best life now?" Am I just coasting by? Will I look back on my life and say I daydreamed my life away? God, I hope not. I can't really do much about the past- other than learn from it. I need to move past any guilt about it. I read a quote recently- "Make 'someday' today." I think to make 'someday' today - I am going to have to start choosing to live my life and not daydream it away. I think it will have to be just one day at a time. One choice at a time. I can't beat myself up though if there are times when I MD. I just hope to improve my batting average where I step up to the plate of life. It doesn't matter if I don't hit the ball out of the park. It just matters that I am at the plate swinging. And not daydreaming for hours about swinging the bat. I will have to take more risks. I will have to experience unpleasant feelings rather than go to MD as a coping mechanism. I do think I have exercised my right brain through MD throughout the years that I know I am a creative person and that I can move from maladaptive daydreaming to manifesting my dreams. One day I will write that book or two I want to do. I just have to start with the page and trust the process.</p>DD when you should be sleepingtag:wildminds.ning.com,2013-08-03:4661400:BlogPost:1521102013-08-03T03:39:32.000ZWindy City Day Dreamerhttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/WindyCityDayDreamer
I have daydreamed when I should be sleeping. Sometimes I dd the whole night. Unbelievable. Then, I am tired the next day. Sometimes which is often, I wake up and want to start dd. I choose tonight to get some sleep and when I wake up tomorrow I want the first thing that I want to do is to hug my son.
I have daydreamed when I should be sleeping. Sometimes I dd the whole night. Unbelievable. Then, I am tired the next day. Sometimes which is often, I wake up and want to start dd. I choose tonight to get some sleep and when I wake up tomorrow I want the first thing that I want to do is to hug my son.A decision to maketag:wildminds.ning.com,2013-08-03:4661400:BlogPost:1521032013-08-03T02:26:17.000ZWindy City Day Dreamerhttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/WindyCityDayDreamer
My son is asleep. My husband is cooking dinner. I could daydream right now. I think daydreaming protects me from taking risks in my life. It easier to daydream that you are a writer than to try to actually be one. It is easier to daydream that you are in the throes of deep romantic love than create it in real life. In my day dream world I can control if I get rejected, not in the real world. My decision is to not daydream right now. It is a small triumph that could lead to others small…
My son is asleep. My husband is cooking dinner. I could daydream right now. I think daydreaming protects me from taking risks in my life. It easier to daydream that you are a writer than to try to actually be one. It is easier to daydream that you are in the throes of deep romantic love than create it in real life. In my day dream world I can control if I get rejected, not in the real world. My decision is to not daydream right now. It is a small triumph that could lead to others small triumphs. Then, I have to decide what to do. Becoming fluent in Spanish has been on my bucket list so I think I will learn done Spanish verbs before dinner is ready. NamasteCelebrity Images Trigger; The Ups and Downs of an MD life.tag:wildminds.ning.com,2012-10-02:4661400:BlogPost:1033332012-10-02T13:20:13.000ZWindy City Day Dreamerhttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/WindyCityDayDreamer
<p>In the morning when I woke up I started DD. I wish I could enjoy the time with my son and not DD. I also surfed the Internet looking at the lives of certain celebrities which is also a trigger for my MD. Any time I am walking (normally with music but can be without) I also DD. One day I think I daydreamed so much that I had a headache. There is cycle- DD, Guilt, DD, Guilt. I sometimes beat myself up as to why I can't stop this MD. Otherdays, I say to myself it is a condition you are…</p>
<p>In the morning when I woke up I started DD. I wish I could enjoy the time with my son and not DD. I also surfed the Internet looking at the lives of certain celebrities which is also a trigger for my MD. Any time I am walking (normally with music but can be without) I also DD. One day I think I daydreamed so much that I had a headache. There is cycle- DD, Guilt, DD, Guilt. I sometimes beat myself up as to why I can't stop this MD. Otherdays, I say to myself it is a condition you are living with and you are doing the best you can.</p>http://majikthise.typepad.com/majikthise_/2005/08/daydreaming_and.htmltag:wildminds.ning.com,2012-08-13:4661400:BlogPost:981662012-08-13T02:40:03.000ZWindy City Day Dreamerhttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/WindyCityDayDreamer
<p><a href="http://majikthise.typepad.com/majikthise_/2005/08/daydreaming_and.html">http://majikthise.typepad.com/majikthise_/2005/08/daydreaming_and.html</a></p>
<p><a href="http://majikthise.typepad.com/majikthise_/2005/08/daydreaming_and.html">http://majikthise.typepad.com/majikthise_/2005/08/daydreaming_and.html</a></p>Use of MD to Mask Pain: Thoughts?tag:wildminds.ning.com,2012-08-12:4661400:BlogPost:979792012-08-12T07:48:02.000ZWindy City Day Dreamerhttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/WindyCityDayDreamer
<p>I would be interested to know if others use maladaptive daydreaming to mask the pain they feel in real life. I don't think I will ever get over this addiction until I get to the source of the pain and heal from it. Below are the pains that I feel:</p>
<p>1. Pain of inadequacy. I had a step-father who was very critical of me when I was growing up. I have not felt that I am good enough. In my DDs, I am an idealized version of myself where I am more than adequate and I am…</p>
<p>I would be interested to know if others use maladaptive daydreaming to mask the pain they feel in real life. I don't think I will ever get over this addiction until I get to the source of the pain and heal from it. Below are the pains that I feel:</p>
<p>1. Pain of inadequacy. I had a step-father who was very critical of me when I was growing up. I have not felt that I am good enough. In my DDs, I am an idealized version of myself where I am more than adequate and I am somebody.</p>
<p>2. Pain of loneliness. As I child, I was a latchkey kid. I spent alot of time alone. I pretended that the girls on the TV show "Facts of Life" were my friends. Through my DD, I was no longer lonely because I had a lot of imaginary friends and was popular in my DDS. Now, I am in a marriage where my husband works alot and I feel lonely. We lack intimacy in our marriage. In my DDs, I am desired and loved.</p>
<p>3. Pain of Settling for a Career I do not love. I have always been a creative person- love to write, sing, and dance. I never really pursued the artistic life. I settled for a career as an attorney but I have DDs where I am an actress, dancer, or writer.</p>
<p>Somehow I feel better for just writing this. I am very thankful for this network because I have a place where I can tell the truth no matter how painful it is and not pretend that everything is okay.</p>
<p>I like to think of myself as a spiritual person. I don't really know how I am going to heal myself but the voice that I hear in my head right now is "Let Go, Let God."</p>
<p> </p>Colorado Movie Theater Massacre- Sunday, July 22 as a Day of Remembrancetag:wildminds.ning.com,2012-07-21:4661400:BlogPost:961952012-07-21T18:52:53.000ZWindy City Day Dreamerhttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/WindyCityDayDreamer
<p>In memory of those who lost their lives (12 died) and the 59 injured at the Colorado movie theater and their families and loves ones, I encourage fellow malaptive daydreamers to consider abstaining from maladaptive day dreaming this Sunday. </p>
<p>I feel powerless as I hear about this tragedy in the news. It is a reminder to all of us that one minute you can be alive and another minute you are dead. Life is such a gift and so precious. Those who lost their lives in this tragedy will not…</p>
<p>In memory of those who lost their lives (12 died) and the 59 injured at the Colorado movie theater and their families and loves ones, I encourage fellow malaptive daydreamers to consider abstaining from maladaptive day dreaming this Sunday. </p>
<p>I feel powerless as I hear about this tragedy in the news. It is a reminder to all of us that one minute you can be alive and another minute you are dead. Life is such a gift and so precious. Those who lost their lives in this tragedy will not be able to hug their loved ones, eat an ice cream cone, see another movie, or be able to fulfill the dreams they had for this life. Victim Jessica Ghawi was an aspiring sports writer and she was not allowed to bring her dream to fruition. I hope none of us dies with our music still inside of us. I hope you will join me tomorrow in abstaining from maladaptive daydreaming as a dedication to the victims and survivors of this massacre. We honor them by celebrating our own precious lives and not maladaptive day dreaming them away. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>I am a maladaptive day dreamer in recovery. Taking it one day at a time.</p>