You are most definitely not alone!  What you described sounds very common.  You will not be judged here.  People are very welcoming.  I hope we can help.  

Hi,

Just did a search based on age because of all the new members and am sending a "hello!" off to people in the old as dirt (like me!) crowd. 

Crap! Just lost a question someone asked me so I am not sure if it was you or not. Yes I do have a black cat.