MD at first made me feel happy, but really, it turned my life upside down. I was mentally incapable of making good decisions, traveling places and maintaining positive relationships. MD actually swept me away from having it better, which is ironic. When I was in my youth, MD seemed to naturally be a part of who I was, so I didn't mind it. It took me on wild adventures and mystery rides, while I walked through my everyday life. So basically, I had a real life that never was, because I was mentally preoccupied in my fictional life. When I came of age, I had plans to travel and showcase my artwork, but my plans got foiled. My family found out about my daydreaming and my mom felt she had to restrain me. So I didn't travel anywhere and take much school after I graduated from college. I was working hard in a string of jobs to make myself financially secure, so I didn't make time to do much art and hardly displayed anything I did. I got lazy and was addicted to online videos. So I only draw and paint on weekends. Still, I haven't managed a plan of attack to be independent, because my jobs typically don't last a year. It's so frustrating that it's hard to get a job and prove yourself these days. Why can't companies just keep you on board? 

Well, yeah, it keeps us trapped and not wanting to get out of it. I think at the center of it all, MD happens because of some unfulfilled need or the need for closure from a bad experience. Like for me, it was the need to be "cool" and popular amongst others in school that started this cycle for me. What do you all think? Does this make sense?

Everybody simply didn't find me an interactive and talkative person. Which in their mind wasn't normal. I didn't have a clue what was the matter. I just didn't want to talk much. People always thought I was either stupid, tired or thinking a lot, or in a bad mood. It tore me up. I wish that I could explain to them what was going on with me. But I found this hard to do. Many thought I was being hostile on purpose, so they ultimately got mean. When I say mean, some of them were pretty nasty to me. It took me years to get over the traumas evolving around my quiet demeanour. Most of the events happened in my home town in all the schools I attended and places I worked at. Interestingly enough, I never left my hometown. Any other person would've flown away for good riddance. But I couldn't afford to move out after making precarious career decisions. So I used my MD to keep me uplifted, as my life seemed to head nowhere. My adulthood wasn't close to what I imagined it would be. I never moved out, thrived in a career, nor married and didn't have children. I didn't even achieve my goals to travel. My mom believed that I couldn't succeed in anything all except for art. I took her word for it, as I've had so many jobs since I was a teenager, but none so long enough to keep me independent. I had problems with communicating and performing well at work. The staff and customers found me rather shy and unlikable. Rest of my career life, I mainly worked on a computer at desk, doing freelance projects for clients. Though I felt like I was in solitary confinement, I used my MD to escape feeling bored and lonely—I still do this today.