We spend so much time focusing on what we don't have.  Let's start thinking about what we want.  Write anything that comes to mind, be it a cup of coffee or to achieve some great goal.  


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-I want to one day be very self-sufficient

-I want a corset (not entirely for waist training, only partly. For comfort, and posture, so it will NOT be tight-laced. And yes, I did lots of research on them before I decided I'd get one made when I had the money, if I still wanted one. Which I do still. Now I just need to either get into my savings, which I only recently got access to, or wait until sometimes in the next two/three years I'll probably get a job and pay. Which one should I choose, people? And is that technically focusing on what I don't have? Ah well. I still want)

-I kinda want Cordellia Amethyste Rose's name, just because it sounds so awesome. Either that, or, if I have a daughter one day, that could be her name. But I find it's so much easier to find unique, flowy names for girls than it is a sort of harder, less flowy name that I like for a boy...

-I want to not only be self sufficient,(like I said first) but also have more land than I need (I'm thinking of 7 acres, and 5 could keep a family of 6 well-fed with occasional surplus to sell)  so I can have some extra dogs and horses, and so more land is needed for hay, and some land for a foresty thing with a few types of wood. The dogs would have a field day in there, and acre or maybe two.

-I want some people to stop being such *insert many swearwords here*'s because too many are way to cruel, uncaring, ignorant, selfish and close-minded (okay, I'll admit I am a little selfish, but why not indulge a little? Okay, so I've been a little more spoiled than many kids money-wise)

- I want to not keep putting off contacting my friends first

-I want to NOT STRUGGLE TO SLEEP. And become un-addicted to these sleeping pills. Stupid doc trying to ween me off them, that's what actually got me addicted. I was fine after having them every night for 3 weeks,could sleep without them fine then, but an extra month of every second night, and one month left, and for the past week I can barely sleep without them, so I'm trying not to take them. Which is hard, because I have more on in the past 7 days than expected

-I want to be fitter

-I want to not have this MD, dammit!

-I would kill (honestly, I think I nearly would do so) for a VIP ticket to one of Emilie Autumn's shows, preferably Zurich, (if it's not rated over R-16. I know Sweden shows are R13. Or maybe she should come here to NZ for a show) and so I could see her live, and meet her and that would be really really amazing but because of building this house and  then Mum/Dad separating and lowering their incomes there's no way in Hell Mum could help me get anywhere further overseas than Australia to see Em, and she's not going there for her FLAG tour I don't think, and even if she was, it would cost Mum maybe a few hundred to get the show tickets and flights and lodgings and stuff, and I'd want Ash with me because she's the only friend that actually also LIKES Em and is likely to like her new album, because JH would think her new albums too metal, even though she likes some of my other music.

-I want to go see Nightwish's Imaginaerum tour live, AND get the movie for it tooooo!

-I want to be more witty outside of my daydreams, and have a sharper mind. And be more observant, which is hard because of the DDs

-I want to see a wolf one day, in real life, a wild one, but because people used to always shoot them, it's not in their instinct to run from humans unless they're raised with them, so that won't be so easy.

-Foxes have been tames, and I want one. A grey, red and silver, preferably. If I could only have two, it's be a red and silver one. But I most likely can't get them, they'd cost lots, and I'd never get them into the country, there's never been one here

-I want to improve my Schweizer-Deutsch (is that spelt right? Swiss-German. Or at least regular German)  And then go back to Switzerland (for a while. I've actually been considering lately to go live there for a few years and save what I can, and then come back to NZ and be self-sufficient. Or maybe convince JH to live in der Schwiez with me and we share a self-sufficient holding.) and see my family because the first and last time I've been was end of 2009 and my german sucked then, so it wasn't as good as could have been.

-I want people to stop torturing animals, both pets and 'factory farm' animals. If you're going to raise an animal, raise it happy. If you're going to kill one, kill it quickly without it knowing that something bad might happen.

-I want people to stop mistreating and torturing their kids. It does still happen, and is absolutely disgusting.

-I want to not fear that the world will soon end up over-populates. Actually, it already is, in my opinion, and it kind of scares me, especially because so many are either sick, really, really mentally/physically disabled and not going to really help anyone, and because far, far too many are cold, heartless, cruel, or just plain ignorant, and they shouldn't be here. In my honest opinion.

-I want so many people to NOT be starving

-I want so many people to not be depressed, anorexic, bulimic,  have anxiety, stress or PTSD. Everyone has something amazing about them, contradictory to what I just said, it depends on what mindset I'm in. You're ALL loved by someone.


Actually, I think half of that was more complaining, and wanting things I know will never happen. But some I will be able to get/make happen. I hope. Also, 'FLAG' stands for Fight Like A Girl =)

That was long. Sorry!

Oh, and also, if by the very small, near non-existent chance that I know you or will one day meet you, at the moment, the corset thing's a secret. Well, not so much anymore, seeing as I just posted it on the internet with my real first name, but whatever.


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