Do you want to defeat this? - Wild Minds network2024-03-29T11:55:48Zhttps://wildminds.ning.com/forum/topics/do-you-want-to-defeat-this?commentId=4661400%3AComment%3A346&feed=yes&xn_auth=noI want to stop. I have been t…tag:wildminds.ning.com,2014-07-24:4661400:Comment:1889492014-07-24T23:58:36.572ZKatherine Milanohttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/KatherineMilano
<p>I want to stop. I have been trying to stop for over a year now. Living with maladaptive daydreaming isn't really living. The misconception that I used to have was that by daydreaming, I could create a world and characters and experience life, just life that I could control and make everything I wanted it to be. After finally coming up for air and seeing life, at least for a few weeks at a time, without daydreaming, I realized that real life is something completely different from life inside…</p>
<p>I want to stop. I have been trying to stop for over a year now. Living with maladaptive daydreaming isn't really living. The misconception that I used to have was that by daydreaming, I could create a world and characters and experience life, just life that I could control and make everything I wanted it to be. After finally coming up for air and seeing life, at least for a few weeks at a time, without daydreaming, I realized that real life is something completely different from life inside my head. Daydreaming is really only like watching a movie, just one that I am seriously invested in. It isn't life. I mean, I don't even have the sense of touch in my daydreams. How can that even pretend to be real life?</p>
<p>In my opinion, it is not only a dangerous habit but a pointless one. Those moments that are spent daydreaming could be spent in the much fuller real world. Or in useful, inspiring corners of your mind, the parts that actually process the world and improve your understanding of and love for it as opposed to running from it. In addition, it is impossible to get any new experiences of life from your daydreams. You are creating the world, and you can only create it out of the parts of the world that you know. The people that exist in your mind are not real people, they are your foolish perceptions of people. They cannot surprise you or teach you anything new. You cannot gain any wisdom or strength from them. You can repeat the feelings of friendship and love that you have experienced before or, more often and more uselessly for me, that you have seen played out for you, but they cannot love you in any new, surprising way that changes your life or your person.</p>
<p>In my daydreams, I cannot actually experience pain, or love, or anything. I can pretend that I am, but why? One moment of actual life contains more things to be felt than an entire lifetime of daydreams. And yes, this world sucks sometimes, but I would much rather experience real, aching, not-fun-at-all pain than that which I create for my own pleasure. That is such an incredibly obscene thought, that pretending to be physically and mentally tortured can give me some sort of weird high. I like this world. It has music, and people, and the color yellow. And yes, my daydreams have these things too, but only because I experienced them here first. My daydreams do not have a lot of things that this world has. Once again, I can't feel anything. In my mind, I can die a violent death or kiss my true love, but not really. There is more sensation in accidentally bumping into someone on the street. I cannot taste. I cannot smell. I cannot read a book. I can only pretend to do these things, but that is so pointless when I could actually be out here doing them.</p>
<p>When I daydream, I miss out. Not only on living a fulfilling life, because I honestly was doing reasonably well in my life even when I was daydreaming full-time. I miss out on this moment. My good friend dead British journalist G.K Chesterton once explained that everything in life has a poetry to it, even the things that seem to be the most mundane. I don't want to miss out on any more of that.</p> I like it when it's just in t…tag:wildminds.ning.com,2014-07-24:4661400:Comment:1886882014-07-24T09:32:34.641ZRosehttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/Rose648
<p>I like it when it's just in the background and it's something to do when I feel like it. I don't like it when I have a massive 'need' to do it and it doesn't go away, and I don't like it when I'm in the 'real' world too much. I read a book on meditation from the 60s and it said that you've got to go out of your mind sometimes to stay sane, and I need my DD to channel my creativity. Without it, my emotions go haywire and music and art aren't enough. I start feeling like I'm getting strong…</p>
<p>I like it when it's just in the background and it's something to do when I feel like it. I don't like it when I have a massive 'need' to do it and it doesn't go away, and I don't like it when I'm in the 'real' world too much. I read a book on meditation from the 60s and it said that you've got to go out of your mind sometimes to stay sane, and I need my DD to channel my creativity. Without it, my emotions go haywire and music and art aren't enough. I start feeling like I'm getting strong ADHD ad OCD symptoms (I have Asperger's) and I become hyper sexual.</p>
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<p>My character in my DD helps me interact with people in real life. My DD has helped me learn how to deal with people, deal with situations, talk things through and understand different consequences and how to understand things from others' perspectives. I don't see how this is any different than someone talking to their pets or to God.</p>
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<p>I don't like it though when it becomes a drug and all I want to do is be my DD character. I also don't like it when i want to be in my DD so bad I nearly have breakdowns because I realise how far away my DD is from real life and I'll never be my character.</p> Yes , i want to defeat this,…tag:wildminds.ning.com,2014-07-17:4661400:Comment:1882532014-07-17T17:43:02.584Zmaseerahttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/maseera
Yes , i want to defeat this, it is horrible that i m imagining a situation and reacting according to it, plz suggest me how to quit it
Yes , i want to defeat this, it is horrible that i m imagining a situation and reacting according to it, plz suggest me how to quit it I don't want to defeat this n…tag:wildminds.ning.com,2014-06-18:4661400:Comment:1855092014-06-18T20:11:10.562ZKai Retanahttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/godofrainbows
<p>I don't want to defeat this necessarily. I want to control it. I've been getting better at controlling it, but now I fear that it might disappear completely and I don't want that. I love my daydreams, I really do. I have grown attached to them. However daydreaming too much can cause problems.</p>
<p>I don't want to defeat this necessarily. I want to control it. I've been getting better at controlling it, but now I fear that it might disappear completely and I don't want that. I love my daydreams, I really do. I have grown attached to them. However daydreaming too much can cause problems.</p> I am conflicted about my answ…tag:wildminds.ning.com,2014-06-18:4661400:Comment:1854132014-06-18T00:20:19.805ZEmilyhttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/Emily276
<p>I am conflicted about my answer. On one hand, I would most definitely be happy about doing away with my constant, excessive daydreaming all together. This would mean that I would gain back my motivation for things in life, and I would be able to concentrate better than I currently do now. I may even have better relationships with other people. </p>
<p>On the flip side, my daydreams are my much welcomed escape from reality. Many times, I find myself wishing that my daydreams would become my…</p>
<p>I am conflicted about my answer. On one hand, I would most definitely be happy about doing away with my constant, excessive daydreaming all together. This would mean that I would gain back my motivation for things in life, and I would be able to concentrate better than I currently do now. I may even have better relationships with other people. </p>
<p>On the flip side, my daydreams are my much welcomed escape from reality. Many times, I find myself wishing that my daydreams would become my reality. My dreams calm me down and make me feel happy and secure in times of distress. They help me to forget all the bad things that happen in this world, most of which I don't know how to handle. I've even grown attached to my dream self, who embodies everything that I wish to be as a person. So it would be hard for me to let her go.</p> I dont want to give this up e…tag:wildminds.ning.com,2014-06-17:4661400:Comment:1851822014-06-17T04:02:07.113Zsarah elizabeth clarkhttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/sarahelizabethclark
<p>I dont want to give this up either I see mdd as something that enhances my life. I have ocd and I suffer because of that but daydreaming cheers me up and brings happiness to my life.</p>
<p>I dont want to give this up either I see mdd as something that enhances my life. I have ocd and I suffer because of that but daydreaming cheers me up and brings happiness to my life.</p> I feel life would be so borin…tag:wildminds.ning.com,2014-06-14:4661400:Comment:1850602014-06-14T00:38:53.976Zmakeda nohttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/makedano
<p>I feel life would be so boring and uneventful without it but I also want to be fully alive and aware in my life instead of being half there, and never being able to focus and keep going back to scenarios that I desperately want to happen but never will is really discouraging and just I don't know that's a good question. I just wish I was normal when it came to this. But I guess everyone has something "wrong" with them mentally.</p>
<p>I feel life would be so boring and uneventful without it but I also want to be fully alive and aware in my life instead of being half there, and never being able to focus and keep going back to scenarios that I desperately want to happen but never will is really discouraging and just I don't know that's a good question. I just wish I was normal when it came to this. But I guess everyone has something "wrong" with them mentally.</p> I really wish I could stop. …tag:wildminds.ning.com,2014-06-10:4661400:Comment:1846482014-06-10T19:34:49.442ZEmmahttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/Emma499
<p>I really wish I could stop. I know there are a lot of people who struggle with horrible and unfair issues in their lives, and MD probably helps them cope and function. In my own case, my real life issues are more run-of-the-mill. I use the MD as a way to ignore my problems. I know this, and if I could stop it, I think I would be better at facing my problems.</p>
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<p>On the other hand, there really is no easier way to be completely absorbed in something immediately fulfilling and…</p>
<p>I really wish I could stop. I know there are a lot of people who struggle with horrible and unfair issues in their lives, and MD probably helps them cope and function. In my own case, my real life issues are more run-of-the-mill. I use the MD as a way to ignore my problems. I know this, and if I could stop it, I think I would be better at facing my problems.</p>
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<p>On the other hand, there really is no easier way to be completely absorbed in something immediately fulfilling and exciting as just living in my daydream. The problem is that it isn't real. When I work hard and do things in the real world, it is much more complicated and difficult and messy. When I'm in a heavy period of daydreaming (like right now), it's really hard to fully engage in the real world because reality just can't compete with that level of stimulation. But I'm old enough and experienced enough to know that when I plant my feet firmly in the real world and work hard at that instead, then my real life becomes rewarding and meaningful. Then I desire less time in my daydream.</p>
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<p>In that way, it's really an addiction. Right now in this moment, I want nothing more than to sit in my story. But in the larger picture, yes I very much want to be rid of it forever.</p> I've tried to stop daydreamin…tag:wildminds.ning.com,2014-05-01:4661400:Comment:1808622014-05-01T02:55:24.394ZThe1andonlyAbberhttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/The1andonlyAbber
I've tried to stop daydreaming a few times but had to start again because I just felt so...empty. It's hard to describe.
I've tried to stop daydreaming a few times but had to start again because I just felt so...empty. It's hard to describe. I think my psychologist's app…tag:wildminds.ning.com,2014-04-30:4661400:Comment:1808402014-04-30T11:04:20.970ZAlexhttps://wildminds.ning.com/profile/AlexandraHorton
<p>I think my psychologist's approach is the one I want for myself: merging my dream self with my real self. Yes, I could never live without it and I don't want to. I'd rather live fully in the clouds than fully on the ground, but a middle ground is ideal. But the only real downside I have to MD is social isolation and I've been dealing with that for pretty much my entire life.</p>
<p>I think my psychologist's approach is the one I want for myself: merging my dream self with my real self. Yes, I could never live without it and I don't want to. I'd rather live fully in the clouds than fully on the ground, but a middle ground is ideal. But the only real downside I have to MD is social isolation and I've been dealing with that for pretty much my entire life.</p>