Hell everyone. I am a 17 year old guy that is basically the the brinks right now. I think I am running out of options . I am not doing well at all. Falling at everything, at school. I have no friends at all. Well I thought I did but not really anyone close at all. I went to a school dance and basically did nothing there at all. Just sat down and my well friend I coukdn't go up and speak to her and she didn't try to come after me. She ignores me when I speak to her anyway at times. I just hate myself. I feel suicidial but I just cannot even attempt to do it. I am juat completely empt y with no interest or hope in anything. Just flowing on by in life at this point. What can I do now?

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Comment by Lucy McGillicuddy on February 20, 2015 at 11:07pm

Chris, 

Everyone who has commented on your thread is absolutely correct--though you may not feel it, there are people who care about you and love you and whose lives would be darker were it not for the light that you bring them. I'm not being cheesy--I really mean it. 

Being 17 is tough and uncertain, and one of the only ways to defeat your feelings of helplessness and self-loathing is to take charge of yourself and your own life. You may not want to. You may not feel like it. But you have to. Think of it as survival--sink or swim. Even if you have to force yourself to. 

Richard Quest mentioned joining a club--that's an awesome idea for socializing and making friends, and I highly recommend it. But if you feel like you can't bring yourself attend a club meeting, join up with something that you have to show up to, like a job. I was in high school when I started to struggle with depression and social anxiety. I got a job at a fast food restaurant because I needed extra money, and I actually ended up enjoying the experience--I met a lot of interesting people, I learned how to interact with others better, and I made bank, to boot. 

Another great way to find meaning and make friends is to do something for others--volunteer at the literacy center, help the old lady who lives next door with her yard work, work the concession stands at your school's sporting events. When you help someone else, it makes you feel better about yourself. 

You are a worthwhile person and you deserve to have a life that you want to live. But you have to make it happen. We're here for you when you need to talk. 

Comment by MatthewR on February 10, 2015 at 3:20pm

There are so many kind words here. WM has certainly been of enormous help for me, and i'm very fortunate to have met so many nice people in the forums. I know the chat room is pretty empty these days. Apart from the different time zones, a lot of members only show up sporadically, myself included. But if you leave a blog post, people will get back to you. Like everyone else here is saying, it helps to reach out to someone in your area. Meeting people with whom you have shared interests goes a long way for mental health. Good luck to you, Chris, I hope you pull through.

Comment by Elizabeth on February 10, 2015 at 2:11pm

I think just having a community of people to talk to who can kind of understand what you are going through will help. After all, very few of us have told anyone about what we go through outside of this forum. We are probably the people who can relate most in the world. You say you don't have anyone you feel close too. I think the answer is making new friends who WILL be truer friends. I know it's scary because you've been burned in the past (we all have), but if there is anywhere you will find an understanding and supportive community it will be here. :)

Comment by Chris Parker on February 9, 2015 at 10:09pm

Thank you everyone for writing all of that . Though I still feel the same though. I honest have no motivation to do anything . I just want to get away from it all. I have no one I am close too, and I just feel empty. I am not sure if anything could help me at this point.

Comment by Elizabeth on February 9, 2015 at 6:44pm

Hey Chris. I'm new here so you probably haven't seen me around before, but I'm also 17 (although female). 

I will second Richard Quest and Ivy White, first of all. I know things stink now. Trust me I know. I've had awful days too. We're at an age right now where life is hard enough to navigate as it is. Throw anything else on top of it and it can seem to become unbearable. But it DOES get better. Some way, somehow, it will. I know for a fact there is someone out there who cares about you and worries about you. Even if you can't think of anyone right now there is someone, because nobody goes through life without touching other people in some way. It isn't possible. So please don't give up yet. 

Second of all, as someone who probably is in a similar position, I think people our age who deal with issues like this may have it the hardest. We still have to depend on adults who don't understand us and often don't want to try. We can become bogged down so easily in the stupidity that is teenagerdom. If you're like me, you are probably smelling the freedom around the corner right now, because at 17, we're so close to being done with it all. Personally, my immediate family thinks I'm weird and that I somehow choose to be that way, as if I wouldn't be "normal" for them if I could. But you know what? Normal is overrated. 

I hope this helps in some way. Just PLEASE don't give up! If you want to talk please don't hesitate to message me or whatever! 

Comment by Richard Quest on February 9, 2015 at 6:24pm

Hey Chris,

I'm telling you that things do in fact get better, I was at a point similar to your's a couple years ago, and I'm glad that I reached out for help. For months I felt like complete garbage, where nobody was talking to me or I was all alone. The one thing that did save me though, was just talking to people about your feelings, go to your school counselor, join a club. I was on the brink, and then I joined a club--just sharing a common bond between people helps greatly with anxiety and helped me have friends. Chris, I know we've talked before on here, and you seem like a great person. Don't let things get you down. I want to help, I really do, just message me! :D

Whenever I'm feeling stressed, I take nice walks and admire the fundamental things about nature, how everything has a purpose for the greater good of an ecosystem, how we are all are connected in this universe. Chris, take a deep breath and look at this amazing world. We've all got a purpose, you just need to find out what yours is. Feel free to talk to any of us. We're here for you, this is what this website is about.

Comment by Ivy White on February 9, 2015 at 2:26am

*trying to tell you to get help

Comment by Ivy White on February 9, 2015 at 2:25am

Don't worry about the writing. I'm glad you wrote it since I can at least read it and reach out to you over the internet, which isn't much. I know people always go on this litany of trying you to get help, but at this point I'm afraid I can't offer more than some commiserating and indeed, that advice to seek out help from other sources. Even though that takes a lot of strength and courage.

I've been where you're at, it is tough. Teens were an especially rough time for me, I'm glad I'm older. I hope you'll be able to say that too one day. Feel free to pm me if you'd like to write out more, I'll read it. I maybe won't reply with the most sensible of things, but I'll read it and you'll have my thoughts with you.

Comment by Chris Parker on February 9, 2015 at 12:13am

Also srry if the writings is bad . It is late where I am, I am tired, and I am on a mobile device. My grammar is not normaly this bad.

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