Isn't there a therapy for MD?

[Simran]

Okay......many people on this site have suggested a few things to me to try out myself to stop MD. but its an extremely difficult task. I think a therapy would be much more effective. So here are a few questions, answers to which solve my doubts.

1. Is there a therapy available for MD?
2. MD is not an officially recognized disorder. At least I don't think doctors in India know about it. Will the doctor be able to understand what I'm going through and give me proper treatment? I don't want him to treat me for any other disorder and give me heavy drugs for something which I don't suffer from. I don't want to end up having side effects for no reason at all.
3. The most important question is that I'm a minor and still not capable of visiting the doctor without my parents' company. At the same time I don't want them to know about this. Should I wait?
4. The things about which I daydream are very bad........at least at this age I consider them to be bad. How will tell all this to my parents? If i wait till I grow up, these things are definitely going to harm all my relationships.
5. Is MD actually a disorder that needs treatment? I don't want to let the cat out of bag and the have no positive results.

                                   PLEASE LET ME KNOW. I CAN VERY WELL RELATE WITH YOU"LL. MY GREATEST FEAR IS THAT PEOPLE WILL FAIL TO UNDERSTAND ME AND I WILL BE LEFT WITH NOTHING BUT HUMILIATION.

[Simran]

Dear Rashomon Effect, I agree with you. I know I started it all. I could have stopped it when I was small. I agree it's absolutely voluntary. Thanks for letting me know I don't suffer from a disorder.

But my condition is like an alcohol addicted person.  When a person becomes so addicted to alcohol that it becomes difficult for him to leave it, he has to be sent to a rehab centre, right? And it is ofcourse for his own benefit. Alcohol addiction is not a disorder or a disease. Still it has to be treated. If it is difficult for the alcohol addict to do so himself then this job is done by rehab centres.

This is why I asked if there was a therapy for MD.

Yes, I also used to think MD is a disorder. And I was very depressed when I came to know that I suffer from a disorder. Thanks for letting me know that daydreaming is normal. I'm happy cause I now know that I don't have a mental disorder:-)

[Rashomon Effect]

Iris, I never said "just stop it and get a life."

I never said changing a pattern of thought, addiction, habit, or behavior is easy.

Everybody daydreams. What makes you feel that you have some problem?

You have a job, family, friends. Are you saying that you have trouble focusing?

Everybody daydreams a lot. Most folks daydream 50 percent of their waking hours. Did you know that? That doesn't mean they have a disorder. Folks with mundane jobs daydream more than that.

"But my daydreams come to me in every free moment and be it just for seconds."

That is what daydreaming is, Iris. That is not a disorder. That is normal.

[Iris]

Dear Simran,

I really doubt that you get the right treatment for MD in India. In Europe and America doctors don't seem to have knowlege about it. If you have other mental issues like depressions or others, go and see a doctor - this treatment can also help you to daydream less.

What really helped me, was to accept my feelings like sadness or fear. Have you had times in your childhood, when you felt lonely and helpless? Do you still feel it? MD is an escape-mechanism, so don't avoid your strong feelings - you have to go through them.

Don't worry about your very bad daydreams - everyone has thoughts that you don't tell other people. If you want to tell your parents about your daydreaming you don't have to tell them what you are dreaming about. Some of my daydreams are also very embarrassing.

@Rashomon Effect: You are lucky when you do it voluntarily. (Do you?) I can't avoid it for nearly 30 years now, and I have a life, I work full-time, have a family with three children, friends. But my daydreams come to me in every free moment and be it just for seconds. You can't tell people who are suffering and are in despair: Just stop it and get a life.

[Wakethenight]

I'm going to have to agree with Rashomon Effect with the fact that day dreaming is voluntary to an extent, but there may be some people who DD on here involuntarily as a side effect of some other mental illness. I believe  that people who truly involuntarily DD's will do so even in an emergency scenario where their life or someone else's is at risk. Here's why I agree with Rashomon. I was DDing my usual amount in November. My mother, who has diabetes, had a diabetic low and my brother and I found her on the floor and I had to call 911. From that moment until her emergeny issue was taken care of three days later I did not slip into DDing. Even when I tried to do it while I was in the waiting room just to 'get a way from things'  i could not.Prior to this incident I knew that some of my DDing was just me being bored and I also thought that some of my DD was completely involuntary. After the experience, I realized the moments I thought I was involuntarily DDing was really because my brain was bored and instinctively slipped into a DD because that is what I have been doing since I was a tween (I'm 25 now). 
Simran, First,  I would avoid your DDing triggers, try to keep your mind busy and figure out why you're DDing (areyou bored? is it a coping mechanism for a past trauma?). Then move on from there.  Go see a therapist if you feel like you need to talk to some one to handle issues or if you are exhibiting signs of mental illness.Someone on this forum wrote a good post about how they helped lessen there DD. Her name is Nicole and the post was called "I've had some Success!" http://wildminds.ning.com/forum/topics/i-ve-had-some-success-maybe-... early  is the key. I believe that if I had stopped using DD as an escapism when I was a teen early on I would find it not so hard to not DD now.

[Rashomon Effect]

Jack, there was a lot of evidence that the earth was round prior to Columbus sailing. Um, I don't really know how to respond to you not knowing that a lot of other folks saw evidence of it before it was "proven" or "discovered."

I'm not the one who is rigid.

I want people to get the help they need and improve their quality of life. It is not done by throwing a bunch of folks who share one or two common symptoms into a group with a new label.

Folks who call themselves MDDers share some common symptoms, but not the same condition. That means that folks who really can be helped by understanding that MDD is a symptom, part of, or due to some other condition, are not getting help because they think they have some new disorder that has no treatment options.

I'm not simple minded, Jack. I found this site by typing the same search terms that many others did. I just didn't stop researching at that point. That is a pretty big difference. Daydreaming has been studied and researched for decades. There is a lot more research on daydreaming than just one *rolls eyes* email survey.

[Jack Frost]

One final comment.... Are you a MDD'er? The reason I ask is this: Your rhetoric is that of a strict scientist. But there was no evidence that the earth was round until it was discovered. And also there is no evidence that your opinions are fact either. So I find it astonishing that a MDD'er, most of whom have very imaginative minds could fail to make such observations, and frankly be so rigid in thought.

And Simran, I apologize for hijacking your thread.

[Rashomon Effect]

The "I have an unlimited amount of my drug of choice in my head" argument does not hold up. Folks can choose to do something other than fantasize.  There is NO evidence or indication that folks who call themselves MDers are addicted to their little daydream worlds. It is just an attempt to justify what is 100 percent voluntary. If it is an addiction, it is mild compared to others. People stop MD by simply engaging in life due to a death in the family, a birth in the family, additional responsibilities and so on, without an withdrawals.

But, your opinions are common among MDers. You thought you were the only person who did this; you were wrong.  People who really want to improve the quality of their life look for the truth, even if it is not always pleasant.

Maladaptive Daydreaming is not the problem for anyone. There is some other issue that leads them into the pattern of behavior. MD is a behavior and not a condition unto itself. Folks need to understand that if they really want to take control of their lives.

[Jack Frost]

As I said, I understand your determination in your belief. But in few years I would not be a bit surprised if the scientific world does in fact recognize either of your two terms as a legitimate disorder resulting from long term repetition of day dreaming. It's not that big of a leap to call it OCD, which is already legitimately recognized. Also, it is dissimilar to your characterization as an equal to addictions to TV or video games, in that those items can be removed an the addiction erased. The mind is always there. We will have to agree to disagree.

[Rashomon Effect]

No, Jack. It is not nit-picking.

ADD is a real disorder. It is a legitimate problem.

Mind wandering and distracted thinking occur for a lot of reasons.

Wasting time sitting around fantasizing is not a disorder.

If you are stressed or depressed, deal with that and your urge to avoid reality will be easier to deal with.

Nobody has a daydreaming disorder. They may have trouble dealing with life and choose to avoid it. But the daydreaming is not the real problem. The daydreaming is a voluntary behavior.

It is tough to change a deeply entrenched pattern of thought, but it is possible. What folks describe as maladaptive daydreaming is nothing compared to real issues such as, depression, ADD, autism, epilepsy, alcoholism, etc.

[Jack Frost]

That was just an illustration of nit-picking. The point is that nobody who wants to stop this thing cares about distinctions of nomenclature.