Where wild minds come to rest
Today I am 31 years old. I've been a maladaptive daydreamer for roughly 20 years.
It started when I was 12 years old (circa 1998). I had problems fitting in at school and couldn't seem to communicate with peers. I had Autism too, so it was hard to relate and connect with people. While guys and girls were starting to like each other, they would hang out in groups after school. Whereas, I was so different and 'peculiar', I often went right back home to watch TV in my family's basement lounge.
Well, here it goes. I was watching a old episode of the original Star Trek series, starring captain Kirk, Spock and Bones. I previously saw a biography of William Shatner, so I suddenly had a heart melt over his Captain Kirk portrayal. Silly giggles began to escape my lips and my stomach turned to butterflies. In future, whenever I watched a movie or a TV show, I had a crush on a new actor that portrayed a character I really liked. I would develop stories in my head of having relationships with these characters, going on quests or adventures and doing very interesting things with them...like in a TV series.
However, since then, my imagination grew stronger as I started entering Junior High. Peers in my eighth grade class started catching me laugh at 'nothing' in the room. They often wildly teased about what was so funny and made remarks about the weird facial expressions and bodily gestures I made while I was daydreaming. They even began to mimic exactly what I appeared like whenever I was laughing at 'absolutely nothing.' Daydreaming has also made me extremely quiet,
so many students refused to be my friend. Throughout High school, As much as I daydreamed about needing a boyfriend,
I couldn't win a date with a guy because they just found me 'way too quiet' and so very strange.
Due to daydreaming, my High school grades weren't very good, but I earned a good enough average to make it into an Art & Design College. There I studied Art, Illustration and Graphic Design. I successfully earned a Bachelors Degree and was eager to get a full-time job that I'd really enjoy. However, I found it very hard to land a job spot, and employers were turning down my resume and portfolio—not finding me very skillful enough in Graphic Design and suggested I stick with 'The Arts.'
One day in August, the summer I graduated, I came back home from an interview for a restaurant role. My head was clouded with too much daydreaming after traveling on a bus. So when my dad phoned us to say he was arriving back on his flight from London, I picked up the phone to answer his call....but didn't give my mom the phone. I just hung up and didn't even go down to tell her. When she found out, she was so ballistic and started throwing her arms way up in the air, and bringing them down to the floor shouting "Earth, Earth, Earth...!" over and over again. She then had a stern, cold and hard discussion with me that I never forgot for life. She told me that I will NEVER be successful in any career - not even in administration & clerical duties - that I should stick to MY ART. She also compared me to a couple of the wackiest short-lived artists who ever lived in history. She started sounding just like my former school peers—all nasty and cutting.
Well, as my mother had said it. I struggled in the workforce big time. Whether it was a job in a sign shop, an office, a design studio, a fast food place, maid service, warehousing, a retail store...or anywhere, employers had to terminate me for reasons such as poor communication, not working very fast and not using my critical thinking skills—but most of all for Daydreaming. There were moments in my career path where I did Daydream while I worked and employers often noticed something was very Odd that I didn't Listen, Watch, Move Fast nor Think so they'd start to question or give criticisms.
So, nowadays, I am work from home as a Visual Designer and Writer for Blog Posts. In spite, I still live with my parents, working at home is very nice and my clientele is very pleasant. I make a good weekly salary and my career in graphic art is climbing. There is no harassment coming from other people. There's nobody to question as to why I look so dazed, why I laugh at 'nothing', why I won't listen up, why I make faces or make weird and shaky movements due to my day dreaming. Though, my family still catches me grinning and 'laughing' out of the blue, whether at the dinner table, kitchen area or in the TV living room.