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I'm torn betweeen continuing and truly stopping this.

Hello, everyone... 

Have you ever found yourselves in the following situation?

Lately, due to what I believe to be gradually accumulated stress arousing from difficulties in my every day life, I find myself repeating patterns I thought I had weaned myself off some time ago. For the record, I have been an obsessive daydreamer since I was about six - I'm thirty now. Those patterns include rapid walking when I'm out while listening to music, acting out scenes from stories I'm building in my head when I daydream or even dance to some music when I'm alone... and daydream. This last one especially is something that I had stopped doing for at least five years!

Although even I find myself amused at times at my behavior, they are compulsive and sometimes I end up terrified that I'm losing my grip on reality, on sanity itself. I have shared some of this information with the people closest to me (well, except the dancing thing, I feel too embarrassed for that, honestly!) and they have been very supportive, encouraging me to keep a healthy balance between daydreaming and reality.

But, at the same time...

Daydreaming is like an old friend for me, a friend that I should be loathe to see go for two reasons:
1) It's the best comfort treatment I have for dealing with everyday things that get us all down, and
2) My daydreaming is, for lack of a better word, bookish, in the sense that everything becomes more idealized. That means plain old me gets the same treatment. In my dreams I am strong, cool, extremely attractive, a natural born leader. It's because of confidence born out of this daydreaming that I view the world with a somewhat detached point of view: I don't really invest emotionally on work or social networking. That, mind you, does not mean I don't have a job or friends: I do have both, as well as a stable and loving relationship. But daydreaming is my safety net, in a way.

Do I make any sense, guys? Do you feel the same way? I'd love to hear it!

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Comment by Telepsa on November 30, 2013 at 1:09am

Matthew, it's surprisingly soothing to know I'm not alone in this -- I always thought I would be considered insane for dancing around with myself, no matter what I tried to explain! And yes, I agree with what you say about stress -- I definitely notice my daydreaming tendencies peak when I have had a bad day at work or a confrontation of any kind. The detachment I speak of is a conscious choice really, one that applies to my work colleagues and friendly acquaintances; this filter disappears when someone gets a bit closer. 

ShellyBelly, it's good to hear I'm not the only one conflicted by this. I still hold great hope that I won't revert back to behaviors I had abandoned a long time ago, but nonetheless, even if I was offered a way "out" of every single DD behavior, so to speak, I doubt I would take it at this point. I think it would change my very personality.

Comment by MatthewR on November 29, 2013 at 10:16pm

You make total sense to me. I dance, too, so don't feel embarrassed. I tend to think daydreaming is an introverted way of dealing with stress, so i don't think it's really that abnormal. If reality is getting a little thin, then maybe it's something to be concerned about. But, honestly, you don't strike me in that way. In fact, daydreaming is all very natural to me (it's the ones who don't do it I get very nervous about). Also, I can be quite detached as well. I don't know, maybe it's just a personality thing? 

Comment by ShellyBelly on November 29, 2013 at 5:41pm

You just described me perfectly. At this point, I desire to quite but don't know if I can. DD, I have found, is the way I process my thoughts and feelings. Some people write it out, talk it out, sing it out- we pace it out, dance it out and dream it out. It's just our way. Being here has helped me accept this more, but at the same time, I really DO want to stop. I think it's cool you managed to do it for any length of time. It is a way to self soothe. I just wish I had something didn't zap hours from my day and me me discontent with reality. Oh well. We will get there. Stay encouraged! :-)

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