April 2011 Blog Posts (43)

I can't say I.....

I've always wondered why I couldn't say "I love you". At first I thought it was just because the people I grew up with were mean, and why should I love them? Then I thought I was just weird. Now I'm realizing that I can't say I feel anything. I remember after I got my hair cut, the instructors were asking me if I liked it, expecting some sort of "I" statement back. All I could say was "She did a great job." and "It's great." For the life of me I couldn't give any sort of opinion starting with… Continue

Added by Cordellia Amethyste Rose on April 30, 2011 at 9:19pm — 2 Comments

Three different worlds, and none is real

When I was 6, my parents were talking about a person, who won a lottery. This person could buy probably everything she wanted. And I had a dream: to win a lottery and rent a spaceship. My mom was laughing, saying that no matter, how much money you had, you would never be in space. Ironically, today we have space tourists.

 

Now, I have established 3 layers of dreams, all making me sad.

 

First layer dreams: realistic but hard to…

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Added by Julie on April 30, 2011 at 2:00pm — 3 Comments

Mental health update and weekend plans...

... Or how Angel just can't blog one topic at a time.

 

So here it is Friday, and the residual pain from last weekend's migraine is still here.  Like a spike stuck in the front of the right lobe of my brain, not painful enough for painkillers just enough to be a bother.  Its alright I have an appointment on 5/11 with Dr. C, he will likely adjust my preventative medications again.  That is typical for migraine patients to have to…

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Added by Angel on April 29, 2011 at 3:39pm — No Comments

So here I am.

I would never consider my daydreaming as some kind of issue. It's just my way to live. I've been daydreaming since I can only remember. As a child, in primary school I had imaginary friend. When I was going on a walk, there was always imaginary dog, cat, tiger, lion or bird walking with me. And I've been always "colorising" world around me.

 

And now? Now, I think, it got worse. Not only I'm daydreaming, which stopes me from finishing anything I'm doing at the time. One day I…

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Added by Paulina on April 29, 2011 at 1:43pm — 2 Comments

trying to remember, hoping to forget

 

those moments

that seemed so happy and perfect and true

were less real than my wildest daydreams 

 

for some reason i think this should be comforting in light of what happened. but it's just making me more sad. maybe in time. is it worse if it was always fake or…

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Added by Sparrow on April 29, 2011 at 2:26am — No Comments

Starting all over again

Ever since I started daydreaming when I was five years old, I have based most of my daydreams on books, movies, and tv shows.  I never daydreamed about real people.  I did, however, struggle with feelings that my daydreams made me a freak or that I was irresponsible for allowing myself to indulge in this fantasy.  Over the years, I tried to stop on several occasions, but it never lasted for long.

About a year ago, my sophomore year of college, I learned about MD and discovered this…

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Added by Ellen on April 27, 2011 at 11:30pm — 1 Comment

Too much noise and an introduction to one of my characters.

Migraine is mostly gone, only a little residual pain.  I'm really tired though.

 

Noise is really bothering me today.  People in the hallway shouting or talking too loud, echoing, echoing...  to each other and on their phones too!  Its the courthouse and my office is in the main hallway so we get to hear it all.  Today I can't tolerate the idiocy out there.  That's the way I feel, I'm sorry.  This place was built poorly every sound echoes, so even if they aren't trying to be…

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Added by Angel on April 26, 2011 at 5:08pm — 4 Comments

My very first time sharing. This is my story.

     so i have done this daydreaming thing, as i thought of it since i was a little kid. I can remember how awesome my imagination was back then, playing with legos and building forts and jet cockpits in my room and imagining i was whatever the situation was. now as i grew up, i noticed first in high school that i would do this, not thinking much of it. i was sort of a social nerd and i was picked on from time to time. i remember id play this hockey game on playstation and id pretend while…

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Added by Tim Bergan on April 26, 2011 at 3:42pm — 6 Comments

Feeling more myself again.

The migraine came on anyway, last night.  Thursday and Friday I took my abortive medication which only helped delay it happening.  I felt funny the whole time.  Now that I have the headache, most of the other funny symptoms are gone.  Thank you!  Pain I can deal with.  Pain meds and a little coffee today, by tomorrow I should be all better.  Since I'm no longer feeling strange my brain is mostly back to normal.  I can daydream freely, think freely, and function.  Its pretty good,…

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Added by Angel on April 25, 2011 at 5:27pm — 2 Comments

Does anybody have romantic dreams?

Hello,

 

I'm very new to this and I just discovered this website today. I love it because I've had it all my life and now I have people to talk to about it!

 

The main daydream I often have is romantic ones. Usually, I see one celebrity I like and have my dreams around that.  I will think of different ways we might meet and fall in love one day. I've always been a fan of the beginings of relationships when everything is new and fun. However, I have never acted out…

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Added by Dreamgirl on April 25, 2011 at 4:51pm — 7 Comments

Alone. Worthless?

Part of my healing as been trying to accept myself and avoiding comparing myself to what is "normal".  However, it still gets me down how completely isolated I am sometimes.  Yesterday I went and got my hair cut by this nice girl.  She was so bubbly and wouldn't quit trying to make small talk, which I'm bad at, hate, uninterested in, and don't find very useful.  Whenever people do that I just feel so uncomfortable.  I get winded trying to talk, and it's physically uncomfortable for me.  Plus I… Continue

Added by Cordellia Amethyste Rose on April 24, 2011 at 4:33pm — 6 Comments

Crazy blog story, part 1

Ok, so for my next story for class, I thought I'd try and write the blog of the person in my first story, Miles.  It's basically her chronicling her descent into madness as her sensitivities take over.  I have NO idea if it's good or completely boring.  Does anyone actually want to read this?  It's largely biographical, so I'm even more connected to it and even less aware of whether people want to read my boring issues.  It's not nearly done.  I just thought I'd post what I have so far in…

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Added by Cordellia Amethyste Rose on April 24, 2011 at 1:48pm — 7 Comments

novel about someone with md!

Here's the book:  "overheard in a dream" by Torey Hayden.

Torey Hayden writes a lot of non-fiction.  SHe's a child psychologist who has written books about all the messed up kiddies she worked with, and she's one of my faviourite authors. 

 

But a couple of months ago i stumbled across a NOVEL that she wrote.  It's about a psychiatrist trying to 'unlock' a supposedly autistic boy, and he works a lot with the little boy's mother. 

 

What's interesting here…

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Added by Liza on April 24, 2011 at 12:20pm — 3 Comments

Even when I'm not inside my head, my brain won't stop!

I've been mostly on the outside of my own mind these last couple days.  It feels strange, almost alien to be immersed in the real world as much as I am right now.  It isn't the productive, positive, happy feeling from a few weekends ago either.  Its hazy and dreamlike.  I went to bed last night feeling sick and today a migraine is trying to come.  Maybe its the migraine?  Migraines always do funny things to my brain.  I get words mixed up, forget names/words, get dizzy, nauseous, and…

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Added by Angel on April 21, 2011 at 1:47pm — 4 Comments

So dizzy in my head right now...deep in depersonalization.  Numbness of my face.  Also a little nausea.  Trying to pinpoint what caused it today but I can't see anything.  I have been daydreaming a b…

So dizzy in my head right now...deep in depersonalization.  Numbness of my face.  Also a little nausea.  Trying to pinpoint what caused it today but I can't see anything.  I have been daydreaming a bit today but overall it has been ok, laughing and talking with co-workers.  Started about 2 hours ago.  Fairly good mood, less negative thoughts.  Again, just venting.  Thought maybe if I put it on paper I could see things clearer.  Continue

Added by stormy on April 19, 2011 at 12:15pm — No Comments

I need to go see a Psychologist or a counselor...

Last week I made an appointment with my fam doc for depression pills..I told him a lil stuff about my past and of course me being sensitive I broke down crying, well some tears came out and I held some in. I have to find a psychologist or a counselor to talk to..he thinks its what i really need is to talk to someone about whats bothering me. I don't blame him and I think 29 years is the…

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Added by Days go by as I wonder on April 19, 2011 at 10:00am — No Comments

Official Maladaptive Daydreaming Anatomy Report

Sorry it took me so long!! I've been extremely  busy, we just found out that we have to move out, so we've been moving all of our stuff out of our house. It's not a bad thing though, I've never liked this house anyway! So, finally, 7 days late, here it is, enjoy!:

 

Maladaptive Daydreaming

 

What is Maladaptive Daydreaming? A known 4% of the world has it.(10) Most people have never heard of it before, due to the fact…

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Added by Creator on April 18, 2011 at 10:20am — 25 Comments

lame

Forget everything I said. Everything positive. I am in the same place as last year. I have 6 papers to finish. Three that need to be done tomorrow, two by tuesday. I want to die. I cannot concentrate on them at all. I am going to fail everything just like last year. I keep telling myself this is the last week, pull it together, unlimited summer fun coming right up. But it won't be the same. Having to tell my parents... they will be so disappointed. They will be mad until I can manage to pay… Continue

Added by Sparrow on April 17, 2011 at 9:28pm — 5 Comments

Hard time staying in the outside world and out of the inside world today.  And I've been at work all day.  Good days and bad days. Guess we all have them. 

Hard time staying in the outside world and out of the inside world today.  And I've been at work all day.  Good days and bad days. Guess we all have them. 

Added by stormy on April 17, 2011 at 2:49pm — No Comments

So you all like daydreaming too?

I found out about this sight in the magazine 'Scientific American Mind'. I was kind of surprised that I am not alone.  I mean, I never thought I was the only one on the planet who daydreamed and fantasized so much but it never occurred to me that psychologists (and others) would studying it on a formal basis. The article in the magazine put a new twist on my condition (or mental illness). I just figured it was part of the psychosis or something and it may be, but thinking about MD as…

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Added by Dave Weiss on April 16, 2011 at 3:43pm — 3 Comments

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