Where wild minds come to rest
I am fixated on imagining myself in the role of an especially nasty villain - gangster, pimp, dictator, brothel owner etc - who receives deserved comeuppance by having his manhood removed.
I direct movies (usually very black comedies) with this basic narrative in my mind for hours and hours at a time in lurid and ridiculously complex detail, weaving Freudian subtexts into the plot and imagining the reaction of the audience to such a movie...sometimes the entire day can be lost to these masochistic fantasies.
I've planned on using this theme as the basis for a novel - but, frustratingly, I have a quite terrible attention span. So my ideas go to waste.
Anyway, I know a lot of people daydream about their idealised self...but I'm wondering if anyone here shares similarly dark and morbid alternate realities?
I haven't fantasized about being the person carrying out these acts, but some of the things that have happened in my daydream have been disturbing-child abuse, psychopaths, cults, rape, baby stealing etc.
Often in my daydreams I'm the one in distress, finding my "people" comforting me. I think its because I lack a support system in my life and have a lot of crap I haven't dealt with.
yes. It does happen. Not anymore, mostly during teen years and early twenties, more specifically when the home life was particularly bad. I guess anyone and everyone who daydreams does at some point have dark daydream themes. Its about processing feelings, more than about being villainous or evil.
Yup I imagine myself as an anti-hero. I think it is the result of feeling powerless. I often imagine what my life would be like in the Walking Dead universe. I freak myself out with some of the stuff I think up; I'm afraid that if I ever shared it with anyone, I would be arrested or locked up in a mental hospital.
I think the best way to deal with these kinds of daydreams/intrusive thoughts is to not pay them much thought. The more you worry about it being strange or scary, the more you will try to consciously avoid having these thoughts which will inevitably trigger you to have those intrusive thoughts. As long as you can recognize that these thoughts are disturbing to you, you're perfectly fine. Don't pay them much thought and they will go away. And if they really bother you, talk to a therapist about it.
TL;DR Don't even think about watching the Walking Dead if you are a maladaptive daydreamer.
My daydreams were extremely dark when I was 12-16, but they don't have that level of darkness anymore (violence and sexual violence, etc). I was extremely depressed back then so can see why I had them but at the time they never disturbed me.
I do sometimes go back into what I call 'the dark side of my mind' unintentionally, when it comes up in nightmares, or when I lucid dream. One particular lucid dream went straight there, then a voice-over in the dream said "see? this is what happens when you play in your mind for too long." It felt like a bad LSD trip. I'm not into drugs, but my old psychologist once told me about bad trips and that's the only way I can describe a lucid dream that turns bad.
I don't daydream about myself, but I always have a 'whipping boy'. Bad and violent things happen to almost all my characters but a theme I have noticed is that there is always one in rotation who is mercilessly tortured. When that character dies or escapes another pops up in their place. I am never not without an outlet for some seriously effed up shizz.
Has anyone been the victim in their DD. I have found personally that the people in my DD are constantly attacking me. It is crazy!!!!!
My longer daydreams tend to touch on/involve darker topics like these. I like setting up these dark ideas so that I can really stretch out the plot and explore it as deeply as I want to, so they might take me days or weeks to complete in my head!
Funnily enough, I'm never the one carrying out these acts....I'm almost always the victim.
I do enjoy them, though. They're a nice change of pace from the usual "idealized self" daydreams.